Niles: What is this, Daphne?
Daphne: I'm chatting on-line with Donny. [the computer beeps] Oh, what's he saying?
Niles: Er, [reads] "I can't wait to come home and see my wittle Engwish cwumpet." Apparently he has some sort of typing impediment.

Daphne: I still can't get over how much they've spent at that auction.
Martin: Oh, they've always tried to one-up each other.
Daphne: I suppose all brothers are like that. Mine certainly were. Everything was a contest. Who could the run the fastest, jump the highest. They even had this strange one where they'd take little brother Michael, put him in a potato sack and see who could roll him the farthest over the frozen lake out back. Oh, they loved that game. Until that year the spring thaw set in early and poor Michael went right through the ice. Oh, they caught hell for that one, they did. Caught it worse a week later when Michael's toe finally fell off. Michael cried and cried until they told him to put it under his pillow for the toe fairy. Then when he got five quid for it, why it was all they could do to stop him from sawing off the rest of them! [laughs]
Martin: [shouting to Frasier and Niles] What's keeping you guys with that box?!

Niles: So, how long did we last the lunch?
Frasier: Well, not too long. Nine thousand dollars doesn't buy the leisurely lunch it used to.
Niles: Wait a minute, I thought it was eight thousand.
Frasier: No, no, you knocked over the aquarium on the way out. You know, whenever I feel envy about your IQ again, I'll just conjure up the image of you sprawled out on the bed of live koi, weeping and desperately trying to revive that little plastic diver.