Frasier Quote #2187
Quote from Frasier in Something About Dr. Mary
Frasier: And we're back. All right, Mary, who's our first caller?
Mary: Maria! Uh, she's thirty-six years old... married five years... and her husband's been staying late at the office so he can meet with his secretary.
Frasier: That's the way to do it! Oh. I mean- I'm sorry, Maria. I'm listening.
Maria: "Hi, Dr. Crane. Anyway, he's having an affair and it's not his first. This has been going on since we were newlyweds. How do I get him to change?"
Frasier: Well, Maria. You of course know it's impossible to force anyone to change. But you can work to change yourself. Usually, women that tolerate this sort of behavior from their husbands are suffering from low self-esteem issues. You may need some counseling to resolve those issues. Let me ask you a couple of questions...
Mary: May I say something?
Frasier: Yes.
Mary: Maria, Dr. Crane is right. You must make a change. And the first thing you change is the lock on your front door.
Frasier: What?
Mary: Oh, listen, there's plenty of time for counselors, but at six o'clock locksmiths start charging extra, so you get on it, girlfriend. You know, my Grandpa Willie used to say, "Nothing stops a man from playing the field faster than a night out on the lawn." Okay? Okay!
Frasier: Oh, thank you, Grandpa Willie!
Frasier Quotes
‘Something About Dr. Mary’ Quotes
Quote from Frasier
Martin: Oh, Fras, how did the show go?
Frasier: It was very educational. Today, Mary taught us how to manipulate our husbands... by withholding sex. And she taught us how to lie to our children about the past.
Martin: Boy, that Dr. Mary sure goes on and on.
Frasier: For the last time, she is not a doctor. No matter how many times she refers to herself as one. "A cat can have kittens in the oven but that don't make 'em biscuits!" ... Dear God, now I'm quoting Grandpa Willie.
Quote from Frasier
Roz: Why did I ever decide to redecorate my bathroom? They give you about a thousand decisions to make. After a while, you can't even tell the colors apart.
Frasier: Oh, Roz, perhaps my discerning decorative eye can be of some assistance, let me see here.
[Frasier arranges the color cards on the table]
Frasier: This one's Ecru, that's Eggshell and this, of course, is Navajo White.
Roz: Very good, Frasier. Now, let's see how you do on the color side.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: Just exactly how would that go? Why don't you play me and I'll be Mary.
Niles: All right. Uh, Mary?
Frasier: Frasier.
Niles: I've been meaning to speak to you. You know, people listen to the show for my expertise.
Frasier: Oh, so my opinion's not worth anything?
Niles: Well, I'm the one with the medical degree. Now, I want you to contribute, but only up to a point.
Frasier: So, you want me to stay in my place, massa!
Niles: She's not going to say "massa"...
Frasier: [adopting the gestures associated with the stereotype of a sassy African-American woman] What, am I getting too uppity for you? You sherry-swelling, opera-loving, Armani-wearing elitist. You have no idea how difficult it is for a black woman in a white man's world!
Niles: Frasier...
Frasier: I don't think so!