‘Out with Dad’
Season 7, Episode 15 - Aired February 10, 2000
When Martin accompanies Frasier to the opera on Valentine's Day so he might meet a woman he's had his eye on, Martin deftly avoids the advances of the woman's mother by saying he's gay.
Quote from Martin
Emily: Frasier, these pieces are wonderful. You've exquisite taste.
Martin: Oh, he gets that from me. Yes, it was worth all the hours I dragged him around to the museums and the antiques shops teaching him about art and, you know... upholstery.
Edward: Were you in the arts?
Martin: Oh, well, actually, Ed-
Frasier: Dad was a cop.
Edward: Really? The, er, uniform and everything?
Martin: Yeah. In fact, uh, that's what happened to my hip. I took a bullet trying to break up a robbery. Yeah, I called for back-up but it never showed up.
Emily: [sighs] Because you were gay.
Martin: [takes her hand] Don't think I didn't wonder about that!
Quote from Martin
Helen: You know, if you like Verdi so much, I happen to have a spare ticket to "Aida" next week.
Martin: Oh, that sounds great. But, er, if it's a week from tonight, I'm busy, I'm sorry.
Helen: Actually, it's next Thursday.
Martin: Oh, Thursday? Oh, you know there's this thing at my... at my wine club.
Helen: That's all right, Martin. We just met. I shouldn't have asked.
Martin: No, no, no. Helen, it's got nothing to do with you. It's me. I'm afraid I've given you the wrong impression of myself. You see, the truth is, I'm...
Helen: Gay.
Martin: .... Uh, right, gay.
Helen: I thought you might be. How many straight men remember Renata Tebaldi?
Martin: [looks over at Frasier] Not many.
Helen: Well, I'm sorry if I was too forward. It's just that sometimes it's so hard to meet nice men.
Martin: Tell me.
Quote from Daphne
Frasier: Daphne.
Edward: We've just been chatting with your delightful physical therapist, Marty.
Daphne: Oh, he's a charmer, this one. Now, aren't you glad you went to the opera? I keep telling him he should get out more, meet people. Most nights he just sits here alone watching the telly.
Emily: He's the exact same way. He'll watch anything.
Daphne: With him, it's mostly sports. Just give him a bunch of sweaty men chasing each other around the field and he-
Quote from Martin
Martin: You didn't tell me this was a set-up.
Frasier: Well, how blind can you be, Dad? He didn't seem gay to you?
Martin: He's English. They all seem gay.
Quote from Niles
Frasier: So, Niles, you actually missed a splendid evening at the opera.
Niles: Well, maybe I can catch it this weekend with Mel.
Martin: Oh, and who's Mel?
Niles: Damn you and your jealous questions! You don't own me!
Martin: Niles, I was only asking!
Niles: [heading for the door] You're always asking, badgering, spying on me. Well, I won't be suffocated anymore. I'm tired of being your trophy boy! It's over, you hear me? Over! [haughty sniff] And I'm keeping the jewelry!
Quote from Martin
Martin: Yes, that was the day I came out. Lying in that alley, covered with blood, bullet in my hip and I said, "That's it! I'm gay, I like myself and I'm not living a lie anymore."
Edward: I had exactly the same experience when I came out.
[Edward places his hand on Martin's knee. Martin's eyes bug out and he looks to Frasier]
Edward: Not, exactly, perhaps. Yours was a bullet in the hip. For me, it was a Lufthansa steward named Gunther.
Quote from Niles
Frasier: So, I'll be going to the opera by myself?
Niles: Oh, well here's a thought. If you give Mel your opera ticket then you won't have to be alone. You can stay here and watch fun movies with Roz and Daphne. Ooh, "Dying Young", it's a... classic.
Frasier: I am surprised by your gall! At the last moment you not only bail on me, you expect me to give up my own ticket.
Niles: Please, Frasier, put yourself in my shoes. I have to do something for Mel. Every restaurant in town's been booked for weeks. I ran into Archie Wilfong today. He told me he had to settle for two seats at the counter at "The Salad Experience". What would you suggest I do?
Frasier: Bring your own wine and order the Spicy Caesar!
Niles: May your opera box be full of cellophane crinklers and the stage swarming with standbys.
Frasier: Get out! ... He goes too far.
Quote from Martin
Martin: No, no, really. Ed, it's not you. You're a great guy, it's just that I'm... dating someone.
Edward: Marty, you don't have to spare my feelings.
Martin: No, no, really, it's true.
Niles: [entering] Hello.
Martin: Darling!
Niles: I'm sorry. Am I interrupting something?
Martin: Oh, not a thing, honey. Just take off your coat and stay a while.
Niles: Okay. I felt bad about that squabble earlier so I thought I'd drop off this little peace offering.
Martin: As if I could stay mad at you. Edward, this is my boyfriend, Niles. Niles, this is Edward. We met at the opera tonight.
Quote from Niles
Frasier: How can you do this to me?
Niles: This was not my idea.
Frasier: Niles, Emily just kissed me in the bedroom and now she's leaving. I have never been so embarrassed in my life.
Niles: You're embarrassed? They think the best I can do is an old man with a cane.
Quote from Martin
Helen: Lovely production, isn't it? I adore Verdi.
Martin: Oh, he's my favorite.
Helen: Though, the woman singing Gilda's a bit off.
Martin: Mmm. She's no Renata Tebaldi.