Niles: Frasier. Where's the birthday boy?
Daphne: Oh, he's getting all dolled up for his lady friend. You should see how excited he is.
Frasier: Not half as excited as he's going to be when he sees these new videotapes. Twelve cassettes of the history of World War II!
Niles: For those who thought the original was fun but too short.

Daphne: Can we offer you a drink?
Sherry: Well, actually, since it's a special occasion I brought some bubbly. Let's crack it open!
Niles: Yes, why not? Oh, look, Frasier, Cold Duck.
Sherry: You ever had it?
Frasier: Just once.

Frasier: So, Dad tells me you two kids met at McGinty's.
Sherry: That's right. I tend bar there. Saw your Dad there one night looking kind of lonesome and I said to myself...
Daphne: [emerging with drinks] Bottoms up!
Sherry: Well, something like that.

Daphne: [dishing the drinks out] Here we go. Well, Happy Birthday.
Sherry: Through the lips and over the gums...
Frasier: Look out, taste buds, here it comes.
Sherry: I never heard that version.

Sherry: I better be careful. Two glasses of that and I'd be dancing on the tables.
Martin: Yeah. You know, Sherry used to be on the stage.
Frasier: On Broadway?
Sherry: Las Vegas. Ever been there?
Frasier: Just once.

Daphne: You know, I keep meaning to ask: what's that lovely perfume you're wearing?
Frasier: Yes, I've been wondering that myself.
Sherry: It's called Milady's Boudoir. You wouldn't believe what a bargain it is. For a hundred bucks I could buy enough to drown myself in.
Niles: [to Frasier, after everyone else has left] I've got sixty.

Frasier: Quick Niles, pull up the ladder. She found our clubhouse.

Martin: You know, that brother of yours can be downright insulting. He's so afraid that someone's going to embarrass him at his fancy dinner.
Frasier: Um, you know, Niles told me about what he was going to say to you tonight. And well, I must say that, in his defense, it is an important evening for him and well, let's face it, Sherry can be a bit much.
Martin: She can, huh?
Frasier: Well, I don't mean it as a criticism, mind you. Some people like that. But now that Niles has broached the subject I must say that I too find Sherry a bit brassy and flamboyant... He didn't say a word to you, did he?

Martin: Fine. That's the way you feel about it? Don't worry, I won't bring her back here any more. I guess it's too much to expect my own family to make a person I care about feel welcome. [Martin heads for the kitchen]
Frasier: Wait a minute! When did you ever make any of the women we were involved with feel welcome?
Niles: Ooh, Frasier, you're right. He almost got away with that.
Frasier: When did Lilith ever set foot in your house that you didn't make her feel as wanted as a fungus?
Niles: Yes, not to mention my Maris.
Martin: You're comparing a warm lady like Sherry to Frosty the Snow-Wife?
Frasier: There! That, that, that. That is exactly what I'm talking about. Oh, why don't we just face facts? I mean, since when has any of us ever - from Sherry to Lilith to Maris to Diane - has ever been able to pick one woman that the other two could stand the sight of?
Martin: I picked your mother.
Frasier: I'm sorry, Niles. I've been hogging the floor.

Niles: A non-fat café, please.
Roz: I'll pay for his too.
Niles: Well, thank you. My day started off with good news and it's already getting better. To what do I owe this largesse?
Roz: Well, I'm having a pretty great day too. You see, a few months ago I took my first tennis lesson...
Niles: And you've finally mastered the backhand?
Roz: No, I haven't played since. But the guy who was teaching me...
Niles: Has won your girlish heart?
Roz: No, he was a loser. But that day he hit me this little dink-shot and I ran for it, stubbed my toe, got this big black toenail that lasted for like three months and today it finally fell off. I can wear sandals again.