Martin: I'm getting rid of that damn painting right now. I just wish I knew why you told the waiter you loved it so much?
Frasier: I was lying to him.
Martin: But you can't lie to me?
Frasier: Dad. Dad, please. Please stop crying. I want to keep it now.
Martin: No, it's no good.
Frasier: No, no, it is good. It's very good. I love it.
Niles: Well, I found the- the- Uh, Dad, are you crying? Frasier, what happ- Oh, my God, you're crying, too. Why is everybody crying? You know how I get when other people cry. Tell me what happened.
Frasier: I made our father cry.
Martin: I'm not crying.
Frasier: Well, I am. I'm the most ungrateful son there is.
Martin: I can never do anything for my sons!
Niles: [wailing] No one wants to come to my party!