Daphne: I'm talking about a dog. They're wonderful companions. Just look at how much Eddie's brought to your father's life. Oh, there's nothing like a dog's unconditional love. Seeing that smiling face greet you at the door. It's one of the most rewarding relationships a person can have.
[Eddie runs in with his leash in his mouth]
Daphne: Again? If you're going to drink out of the toilet, you can at least learn to use it. Would you care to come with me? Maybe get the feel of the leash?
Niles: Perhaps I will. You know, Daphne, maybe you're on to something with this dog business. I'm starting to feel less lonely already.
[Niles walks out with Daphne. He closes the door on the leash, trapping Eddie inside the apartment.]
Niles: Chop, chop. Come with us.

Martin: All right, I'll give it another shot. Those guys at the park make it look great. Eating baloney sandwiches, smoking cigars, sometimes a fist-fight even breaks out.
Frasier: Well, let's just start with name-calling and see where it goes, all right?

Frasier: Now, Dad, please, you don't have to rush. As a novice, you have the right to sit back, survey the board, take your time. I will not pressure you or hover like a vulture. Please, feel free to ask any questions you might have.
Martin: Is this a checkmate?
Frasier: Yes, it is.

Roz: Uh, one double-tall latte, a slice of pecan pie with extra whipped cream.
Waitress: Anything else?
Frasier: Perhaps a blood-pressure cuff?

Roz: I'm just a little nervous today, O.K.?
Frasier: Oh, really? Trouble on the dating front?
Roz: I'm not that shallow, all right? It's about my hair. I've got an appointment this afternoon with Noge.
Frasier: "Noge?"
Roz: He's the hottest hairstylist in Seattle?
Frasier: "Noge?"
Roz: I think he's getting a little bored with me. When he cuts my hair, I can't ever think of anything to say.
Frasier: Well, how's this for an icebreaker: "Say, Noge, where'd you get such a stupid name?"

Roz: Maybe there's something in here that'll hold his attention. Oh, wow, here's something. A lady in Italy gave birth to a nineteen-pound baby.
Frasier: Oh, my God.
Roz: No kidding. She's not going to be hopping on her Vespa anytime soon.

Niles: Daphne, I owe it all to you.
Daphne: Oh really, Dr. Crane, I wouldn't want you going around telling people I was responsible for that.

Niles: The city streets play havoc with her delicate little feet, so I have to go home and pumice her paw-pads.

[After Niles leaves with his new dog, Girl]
Daphne: Am I the only one?
Frasier & Martin: No.
Daphne: Does Dr. Crane have any idea...
Frasier & Martin: No.

Frasier: So, Dad, can I, uh, interest you in an ice-cold Ballantine?
Martin: Yeah, sounds good.
Frasier: You know, I may even join you myself. I've got some pork rinds here and some of that creamy Lipton onion soup dip!
Martin: Oh, with the seven herbs and spices?
Frasier: Well, just count 'em.
Martin: Hey, that's great. All my favorite stuff. You're putting me in a home, aren't you?