‘Big Crane on Campus’
Season 7, Episode 14 - Aired February 3, 2000
Frasier tries to heal some of his high school wounds when runs into the prom queen.
Quote from Roz
Frasier: Oh, Roz, I see the book club has moved on to "Wuthering Heights." Well...
Roz: Oh, please tell me they made a movie out of this.
Frasier: Twice.
Roz: Amen! [bags the book]
Quote from Frasier
Roz: So how did your date with Lorna go? Did you get up enough nerve to ask her to dinner?
Frasier: To dinner and breakfast. We spent the night together.
Roz: Whoa. You went to bed with the prom queen?
Frasier: Yes, and I woke up with Carrie. She smokes, she screams, she's uncouth.
Quote from Roz
Frasier: I'm actually meeting her here to break it off.
Roz: So soon?
Frasier: Well...
Roz: With the way your love life's been going, you may want to squeeze a couple more dates out of it. You know, nuts for the winter.
Quote from Roz
Frasier: What's wrong, Roz?
Roz: My book club meets tonight and I haven't read the book.
Frasier: Oh my, that is a literary 911. Wait. You joined a book club?
Roz: Why is that so hard to believe? I like to read.
Frasier: What's his name?
Roz: Jason.
Frasier: A-ha.
Roz: We met at a book store and he asked me to join his club. He's separated, but I think it's for keeps. He was buying "Divorce for Dummies."
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: The woman who just walked in. She was the great beauty of my high school. She had brains, looks, style and the way she filled out a mohair sweater. Well, suffice it to say it was snugger on her than on the goat.
Quote from Frasier
Roz: Why don't you go over and say hello?
Frasier: Oh God, Roz, she wouldn't even remember me. She was with the in-crowd. The only people that knew me debated, recited or were on a six-month visit from Abu Dhabi.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: God, she's coming over. She's coming over. She's coming over.
Lorna: Excuse me, didn't we go to high school together?
Frasier: Did we?
Lorna: Yes, I thought you looked familiar. You're Frasier, aren't you?
Frasier: Well, that's right. All right, let me guess, em, Lisa?
Lorna: Lorna.
Frasier: Oh yes, of course. Hello. Roz, I'd like you to meet Lorna Ann Lenley. Was that anywhere close?
Lorna: Very good.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: So, er, I'm divorced myself, actually.
Lorna: Yes, I know, I listen to your show.
Frasier: Really?
Lorna: Well, I sell real estate, so I'm in my car all the time. So whenever I can, I turn you on.
Frasier: Oh, my.
Quote from Roz
Frasier: Roz, she's just as lovely as ever.
Roz: So, are you going to ask her out?
Frasier: Oh right, Legs Lenley and Crane the Brain. In my dreams!
Roz: Frasier, you act like you're still some gawky teenager. You're a charming, successful man.
Frasier: Thank you, Roz.
Roz: [mimicking] No problemo.
Quote from Frasier
Lorna: Excuse me, I have to go show a house. Frasier, it was really nice to see you again.
Frasier: Oh, likewise. Er, Lorna, listen, I realize that this is out of the blue and you're very busy but I was wondering if you might like to...
Lorna: Yes?
Frasier: ...appraise my apartment. You see, I've decided to sell it.