Ray: So he's in Africa, huh? I saw this thing on the Discovery Channel once where there were tribes that communicated, like [clicks tongue]... I didn't see the whole special. I just saw a little bit of it.

Debra: I'm sorry I snapped at you. I just-
Lois: Oh, honey. You don't have to apologize to me. I'm the one that's sorry. I know I'm not good at certain things.
Debra: No, no. You're right. This is your vacation.
Lois: No, I mean I- I've never been good at those things. You know, when you were growing up...
Debra: No, Mom, you did other things. We always spent a lot of time together. You know, you took me to museums and the theater. And we traveled. You opened up the whole world to me, you know?
Marie: And that's important.
Debra: Marie, would you mind?
Lois: What, dear?
Debra: A little privacy.
Lois: Uh, Debra?
Debra: Please?
Marie: Well, why don't I just go clean? Also important.

Debra: I want everything to look nice for her visit.
Ray: You know where it's really nice? In that hotel she usually goes to. Little chocolates and dirty movies. It's paradise there.
Debra: No, no, I want her to stay with us for a change. And you know, Ray, sometimes a mother can actually be someone that you enjoy spending time with.
Ray: No she can't.
Debra: Well, that's because yours, like, lives on top of us. I want my mother to have a chance to be a part of this family too. And I want you to make her comfortable.
Ray: I'm not rubbing her feet.
Debra: How about just calling her by her name? Huh?
Ray: Okay, I'll rub her feet then.

Debra: So, Mom? Did you like the park? Wasn't that great?
Lois: Yes, it was a delight. Except for all the screaming.
Debra: Yeah, well, you know. Kids are gonna do that.
Lois: I meant Raymond.
Debra: Yeah.
Ray: There was a bee.

Ray: What does she gotta go wash off for? She sat on the bench all day with her crossword puzzle.
Debra: Well, Ray, she likes to keep her mind sharp.
Ray: Yeah, well, if it was my mom at the park...
Debra: What are you saying?
Ray: Nothing. Just that my mom might be better in certain circumstances than someone else's mom.

Lois: Excuse me, I couldn't find any guest towels.
Debra: That's okay, just use whatever's there.
Lois: You wouldn't want me using someone else's towel?
Debra: It's okay, Mom. We don't mind.
Lois: Oh. All righty, then. And what time is dinner, dear?
Debra: Dinner? That's gonna be, like, in an hour. I'm gonna make some lemon chicken. You want to help me?
Lois: Oh, what good would I be? You're the cook in the family.
Ray: Wow.

Debra: Okay, everybody, dinner. Let's all sit down to dinner together. Mom, you're right here, okay?
Lois: I can't wait. It smells wonderful.
Ray: That's me. I burped.

Ray: Ma, what the hell are you doing in the window?
Marie: We didn't want to interrupt dinner.
Ray: Yeah. Then you better get in a time machine.

Frank: Start cutting, Marie.
Marie: No, not yet, they're still eating... something.
Frank: The deal was I buckle up, follow you over, say hello to the woman. Hello, Lois.
Lois: Frank.
Frank: And you start cutting. So start cutting.

Robert: [enters] Smelled the cake. Then I saw the pan in the sink and didn't see any cake and figured it was on its way over to Raymond's.
Lois: Hello, Robert.
Robert: Hello... there.