‘The Power of No’
Season 9, Episode 14 - Aired May 2, 2005
Ray discovers the power of saying no when Debra's in the mood.
Quote from Frank
Frank: Your mother's got a look, too. Which is why after sunset I avoid all eye contact.
Quote from Debra
Debra: "The power"? I mean, why would he? Oh!
Debra: Oh, my God. Oh, my God! He has been turning me down on purpose!
Amy: Oh, no. Why would he do that?
Debra: For the power! He thinks it gives him the upper hand or something.
Amy: Well, that's gross. Hey, but look on the bright side. This means you're still hot.
Debra: Of course I am! The worst part about this is that it worked. I've been trying to make myself look better for him. Do you know I did 138 sit-ups this morning? All for some guy whose stomach looks like a deflated clown balloon?
Amy: Oh, boy. You're gonna kill him, aren't you?
Debra: No. No, I want him alive.
Quote from Ray
Debra: Robert told Amy why you've been turning me down.
Ray: I hate that guy!
Debra: So you were just toying with me? Getting me to beg for sex that makes you feel good?!
Ray: No! No, I don't know. I just I guess I wanted to see what it was like to be the one being pursued for once.
Debra: But you made me feel terrible about myself! You just kept rejecting me. How could you do that to somebody?
Debra: You had me convinced I was a fat, ugly old lady!
Ray: Well, now you know how I feel! You feel bad because I turned you down, what, three times? Try being rejected 40 or 50 times for the last 10 years. How do you think that feels? You're looking at the president of the fat, ugly old ladies' club. Welcome! Have a donut!
Debra: There is no way I turned you down that much. And I say yes a lot!
Ray: Exactly. You say yes and you say no. You're- You're the bouncer in front of the disco who decides who gets in and who doesn't. And for once, it was you standing outside. Yeah, and you couldn't take it. Yeah, it's cold out there, isn't it, standing in the rain with your bad shirt and your acne pimples?
Quote from Ray
Ray: I'm still gonna go, and you know what? I may go tomorrow because I can do whatever I want.
Robert: What do you mean?
Ray: All right, you thought I couldn't turn down Debra, right? Two times, my friend! Yeah. Last night I told her that I had a lot of work to do today. [chuckles] Work! And then- And then first thing this morning, she started hinting again. She even brushed her teeth and everything, but no sale! Oh, it's amazing. It's like every time I turn her down, she seems to want it more. She's like a guy.
Robert: And she's not getting upset?
Ray: No, no, that's just it. She's been treating me better all day. I came in this morning, she was making me a cheese omelet. I mean, she hasn't done that since before Ally was born. I mean, yeah, it had shells in it, but still... You know what I've discovered? The power of "no."
Quote from Marie
Marie: Oh, don't those look nice?
Amy: Yeah. I don't know why Robert had such a hard time putting them up yesterday.
Marie: Well, he can't handle normal-sized tools with those giant fingers. Here, push that curtain over a little so we don't see his blood.
Quote from Amy
Amy: I'm sure it's not you. Hey, maybe he's sick.
Debra: Nah. I wish he was, but, oh, man, who am I kidding? I should just go with Marie to the "Y," put on a flowery swim cap and float around with the old ladies.
Amy: You know, it's funny you bringing this up, because last night when Robert and I went to bed, he was acting kind of distant too. But then I just kissed his neck and he said, "Ray's crazy."
Debra: He did?
Amy: Yeah. And then he said something about how I could have all the power. It was weird. He usually doesn't like to mention Ray in the bedroom. He says it inhibits him.
Quote from Robert
Robert: Oh, "the power of no". Give me a break.
Ray: Hey, who gets to hit a bucket of balls in the middle of the day?
Robert: Yeah, well, that's just the difference between me and you, Raymond: You like to golf by yourself and have a crappy omelet while I prefer sex.
Quote from Ray
Ray: No, man, you're not getting it. Debra can't keep her hands off me. It's like with the power of "no" comes the power of "yes." Uh-huh. For the first time in my marriage, I finally know what it's like to be the one wearing the panties.
Robert: You have a wrong and generally troubled relationship.
Ray: No, no, no, I don't. It's very right.
Robert: Well, let me ask you something. Why do you always feel the need to be manipulative when it comes to sex?
Ray: Because I'm not very good at it.
Quote from Amy
Amy: Debra, you're really upset about this.
Ray keeps turning me down.
Amy: What do you mean? Sex?
Amy: That doesn't sound like him. He usually follows you around with his tongue hanging out.
Debra: I know.
Quote from Ray
Debra: There is no way you can compare me turning you down with what you did to me! Listen, Ray, if I turn you down, it is because I am exhausted from taking care of three kids all day and thinking of everything that I have to do the next day!
Ray: Still using the kids, huh?
Debra: Oh, my God, I can't believe I ever wanted to have sex with you!
Ray: Well, you don't have to worry because I'm not sure the next time you're getting sex from me.
Debra: Oh, you're threatening me with no sex? Please.
Ray: You will be saying "please" "pretty please with sugar on top."
Debra: Ha! Ha!
Ray: I'm serious. I don't know when I'll be in the mood again.
Debra: You are always in the mood. You wouldn't last a night.
Ray: I just did three nights, Lady Pantaloons. Okay? So we'll see who can't last.
Debra: [Southern accent] Oh my, how will I ever resist my baser instincts?
Ray: I like that. I like the Southern thing. That'll be good when you come back saying, "Pretty please with sugar on top."