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‘The Getaway’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

Everybody Loves Raymond: The Getaway

321. The Getaway

Aired April 5, 1999

Ray and Debra take a weekend trip to a bed and breakfast in Vermont.

Quote from Ray

Debra: Okay, all right. Then how do your parents feel about the Adirondacks?
Ray: What do you do there?
Debra: You rent a nice house. Look at this. Right on the lake.
Ray: We'd be staying in someone else's house?
Debra: They won't be there, Ray.
Ray: I don't sleep where other people have slept.
Debra: What do you think hotels are?
Ray: You're yelling. Why are you yelling?

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Quote from Debra

Debra: Okay, come on, we've got pick one.
Ray: Okay, give me a minute. I just walked in the door.
Debra: I thought you'd be excited.
Ray: I will be. It's just if I get excited now I won't be able to sustain the level of excitement throughout the trip.
Debra: Yeah, trouble sustaining, we know.

Quote from Robert

Ray: You ever been to one of these bed and breakfasts?
Robert: Yeah, with my ex-wife.
Ray: How was it?
Robert: Did you not catch the end of that sentence?

Quote from Marie

Marie: Hello, dear.
Robert: What are you doing here?
Marie: Cleaning.
Robert: Ma, listen, I'm in charge while Raymond is away, all right?
Marie: Of course you are, dear. You're doing a wonderful job. The twins could use a nap.
Robert: I'm handling this.
Marie: I know, dear. I can hear through the vent. Have you thought about dinner?
Robert: I'm ordering pizza.
Marie: No, pizza's not dinner. I'll fix something.
Robert: Did you know she was here?
Ally: Grandma's always here.

Quote from Ray

Debra: Okay, so now here's an old Colonial inn near Tanglewood.
Ray: What's Tanglewood?
Debra: They have classical music. Here's the concert schedule.
Ray: And here's my face.
Debra: Or we can stay at The Plaza, eat at Le Cirque and see a show.
Ray: No, my parents make fun of people who stay at The Plaza.
Debra: What, my parents stay at The Plaza.
Ray: Eh...

Quote from Ray

Ray: A tour of Ben & Jerry's ice cream factory. Can that be a trip?
Debra: Yes, it can. Yes, it can. Because the factory's in Vermont. See, the wild flowers are blooming. And we can stay at this cute bed and breakfast.
Ray: Why don't we just stay at Ben & Jerry's house?
Debra: I'm calling Vermont.
Ray: Free samples. I'll bet there's a catch.

Quote from Amy

Debra: Amy, I'm going to Vermont tomorrow. I have nothing to take on this trip.
Amy: You have a husband. Lots of things go with that.
Debra: Well, right now I'd trade him for a pair of pants that make my butt look smaller.
Amy: You know what makes your butt look smaller? A husband.

Quote from Frank

Frank: Delivery!
Ray: What's that?
Frank: Your mother's moving in.
Ray: What?
Marie: Hello, dear.
Frank: Tag! You're it!

Quote from Ray

Ray: What's all this?
Marie: Well, I'm babysitting for you while you're on your getaway, remember?
Ray: Oh, okay, but we don't leave until tomorrow, so leave until tomorrow.

Quote from Robert

Robert: So I'm a nice guy to have over, but you wouldn't want me staying here.
Marie: What, Robert?
Robert: Nothing. Wasn't asked, wasn't considered.
Marie: What were you considered for, dear?
Robert: Let's see, today's category: child care.
Ray: Look, Robert. I didn't think-
Robert: Oh, you didn't think! Why would you think someone who's trained in CPR, public safety and conflict resolution would be able to babysit?

Quote from Frank

Ray: Robert, you want to take care of the kids? Fine. Mom doesn't have to do it.
Frank: Yes, she does have to do it. That's my getaway from her.
Marie: Well, I can come over here and help.
Frank: That's not the same thing as you staying here and me staying there.

Quote from Robert

Robert: What's with the face?
Ray: I don't know. Yeah, it's just going away together is so much time together.
Robert: What are you afraid of? You guys still [hums suggestive music]
Ray: What? Yeah, yeah, we do. But that's not the problem. It's the in-between.
Robert: Ah, the remains of the day.

Quote from Ray

Ray: She keeps saying how romantic it's going to be, you know. Three days of romantic. I don't see the need.
Robert: Listen, let me give you some advice, okay? These trips are for the wife. It's a weekend. [Ray groans] Raymond, Raymond, Raymond, Raymond. You know, sometimes at the precinct we've got the throw guys into the lock-up for a weekend. And you know which guys have the worst time there?
Ray: The small ones?
Robert: No. The guys who are watching the clock. But the guys who arm-wrestle, play cards, whistle, those are the ones for who time passes quickly.
Ray: Yeah, but I have to talk. Those guys have the right to remain silent.

Quote from Ray

Ray: So listen, that weekend lock-up, how far in advance is that booked?

Quote from Ray

Ray: No TV in the room?
Debra: Did you really want a TV this weekend?
Ray: No, no, no. No, we'll arm-wrestle.
Cecily Daly: Here's your key. And the common bathroom is just across the hall.
Ray: No bathrooms in the rooms either? Can I ask you something? What is in the room? And are we in the room right now?

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