‘The Dog’
Season 1, Episode 19 - Aired March 3, 1997
After Ray takes in a dog that followed him home, he gives it to Robert, who had a similar dog growing up until they had to give him away.
Quote from Robert
Ray: Why don't you take the dog?
Robert: What are you saying? You mean you'd want me to have him?
Ray: Yeah, he likes you. We can't have a dog. We've got a hamster and he's nuts. He likes you.
Robert: No. I'd just be setting myself up for more hurt. You know, every time I get attached to something I just get burned. First dog, my first wife, first lawyer after my first wife....
Quote from Ray
Debra: So this is your dog?
Phyllis: I can't tell you how upset I've been. I left town for a couple of weeks, and came back to find that the gardener had let him out. You know, he's a prize-winning stud.
Ray: I'm surprised he has to work as a gardener.
Debra: The dog, Ray.
Quote from Marie
Marie: Look at them Frank. It's so sweet to see you two getting along lately. It's like old times. Frank, go get the moving picture camera. The whole family's here.
Frank: Eh, those lights are so damn heavy.
Marie: It's a special occasion. I know where it is. Come on.
Frank: All right. There might still be some film left from when we brought Ray home from the hospital.
Quote from Robert
Robert: That's a good boy, Shamsky.
Ray: You named him Shamsky?
Robert: Actually Shamsky ll.
Ray: Robert the owner came by today.
Robert: What?
Ray: Listen, I don't know what to say.
Robert: The owner?
Ray: Just forget about it. I'm gonna tell her that he ran away or something.
Robert: No. Give him to her. I know what it's like to lose a dog.
Ray: I'm sorry.
Quote from Debra
Debra: Ray, what happened over there?
Ray: What do you mean? I told you.
Debra: This is not the same dog anymore.
Ray: What are you talking about? Of course it's the same dog.
Debra: Look closely, Ray. The other end. Doesn't he look a little lighter to you? Ray, he's been fixed.
Ray: Get out of here. Come on, are you sure?
Debra: Yeah.
Ray: Maybe he's a little... chilly.
Quote from Robert
Debra: Maybe she won't notice.
Ray: Debra, the woman breeds dogs. The subject's gonna come up sooner or later.
Phyllis: [returns] All right, look! I don't know who did it. And I don't care who did it. All I know is that my dog is ruined and someone's gotta pay.
Debra: Phyllis we'll try to explain.
Phyllis: I don't want explanations. I want cash. This dog is worthless now.
Debra: Worthless?
Ray: He's still a delightful companion.
Phyllis: Companion my ass. He was good for one thing and now he's broken.
Robert: Don't talk about him like that.
Ray: Hey, look, I'd like to buy the dog from you. Okay? For my brother.
Robert: No you don't have to.
Ray: No. I want to do this, Robert, okay? This is for both Shamskys. It's the least I can do.