Ray Quote #1566
Quote from Ray in The Disciplinarian
Ray: Yes, oh yes! Once, we snuck out to go to the Jethro Tull concert, and he stole a bottle of peppermint schnapps from your liquor cabinet!
Robert: He's lying!
Frank: Yeah, I know he is 'cause I had that cabinet padlocked.
Ray: Yes, that's why he had to inch it away from the wall and pop out the back panel.
Marie: You drank?
Frank: You popped out the back panel?
Ray: And after the concert, Robert was so schnockered, he wanted to fight anybody who didn't agree that "Bungle in the Jungle" was the best song ever written.
Robert: That's a great song... but this is lies!
Ray: Then, I remember the next morning he threw up in the living room, and you wanted to know why the house smelled like mint vomit.
Marie: You told me you had a bad candy cane. Oh, Frank, our sons are juvenile delinquents!
Everybody Loves Raymond Quotes
‘The Disciplinarian’ Quotes
Quote from Marie
Marie: You spent their childhood being a dreadful goon, and all it did was make them want to sneak out of the house.
Frank: Maybe they wanted to get away from you. That's why I sneak out of the house.
Marie: Don't you dare try to turn this around. You insisted on being the disciplinarian. You're the one who said to me, "Oh, don't hug them so much. You'll make them soft." Well, obviously, I should have never stopped hugging them! [hugs Ray & Robert] Oh! I am so sorry I let this crazy man loose on you.
Frank: Stop hugging them!
Marie: No, Frank. That's what parenting is... love. You just love 'em. No matter how many bad decisions they make, no matter how many times they don't listen to you, you just keep loving and hope that maybe someday that love will make them realize how much they hurt you.
Robert: And you wonder why I drank the schnapps.
Quote from Ray
Ray: Guys, it's okay. You can wake up now. Sit up, guys. I want to talk to you. Michael, come over here. Come on. Listen, guys I said something before that was pretty harsh. But, uh, I said it, and I'm sticking by it. Okay, you understand that? I'm not backing down. So if you think Daddy's a party clown, "Look at the bubbles coming out of his heinie" you can just forget about it. But I might have a deal for you guys. You want your TV back, and holidays, and staying up until it's dark out? [they nod] Okay, well, I can make all that happen if you just promise me one thing. Okay? Just promise me you'll obey everything Mommy and Daddy tell you from now until you're 60... 65... 65! Okay? That seems fair. Deal?
Geoffrey: Deal.
Michael: Deal.
Ray: All right, come here. Now, listen, guys, I don't want you to think that I'm an idiot and I really believe that we've got a deal here. Your mother and I have been talking, and we know that you're gonna get older and you're gonna do things, and we know there's nothing we can do about it. But, guys, if you do, make sure we never find out about it. We don't want to know.
Quote from Robert
Debra: Thank you, Marie, but the boys can do it themselves.
Marie: Boys should play. I hardly ever used to make Raymond tidy up.
Debra: I know, Marie, and thank you for that.
Robert: For Raymond, it was, "Don't worry, go play." What I got was, "Robbie, dust the ceiling!"