Marie Quote #443
Marie: Raymond, do you see what they see?
Ray: Um... I don't know.
Marie: No, tell me the truth.
Ray: Well... Maybe if I squint a little.
Marie: Oh, my God, I'm a lesbian!
More Everybody Loves Raymond Quotes
Quote from Lucky Suit
Agent Garfield: Mrs. Barone, you seem like an intelligent woman.
Marie: Thank you. Have a cookie.
Agent Garfield: Do you really think that a mother interfering to the extent that you have could possibly help a man get a job with the FBI? There's something else going on.
Marie: He was supposed to retire! He's a year away from not being a police officer. Which means I could stop worrying about him every second of the day. I want him to be safe. Now he wants to go from one dangerous job to another? How long do I have to walk around with a knot in my stomach? Forever? I can't do it anymore. It's too much. But he wants this job. It'll make him happy. And he should be happy. So, yes, he should have this job. Please, give him this job.
Agent Garfield: I can't do that.
Marie: No. No, don't blame him, you can punish me! Put one of those tracking things on my legs so I can't get out of the house. And if you met my husband, you'd know that's punishment enough.
Quote from Grandpa Steals
Ray: All right, look, Dad. We think you should know that Ally was kind of upset about what happened with the guy at the market.
Frank: Okay. Turn the TV back on.
Marie: Wait a second. What happened?
Frank: Aw, the jackass fruit guy accused me of stealing.
Marie: Frank, please! They're homosexuals.
Quote from She's the One
Robert: This again?!
Marie: A woman ate a fly? Nobody believes your stories, Robbie. Just say it.
Marie: "I'm a gay."
Marie: You'll feel better. "Hello, I'm queer, and now I'm here!"
Ray: Who says that?
Marie: That's the slogan. Just admit it already!
Quote from Marie
Sister Ann: Mrs. Barone, hello. Is that the sculpture you intended to contribute to the church auction?
Sister Ann: Well, don't you think the subject matter is... Might be inappropriate?
Marie: Subject matter? What do you mean?
Sister Ann: Forgive me, but is that not a sculpture of... [whispers to Marie]
Marie: What?! What's wrong with you?
Sister Ann: It's just that it may not be right for the church-
Marie: Are you crazy?!
Quote from Frank
[As Frank stares at Marie's sculpture in the empty exhibit hall:]
Janitor: If you ask me, it looks like a... [whispers]
Frank: ... Holy crap!