Robert Quote #275
Robert: I'm telling you, the ground, it shook.
Frank: Why didn't you run?
Robert: I did run, Dad. I don't know if you've ever been in this situation before, but the first thing that comes to mind is run! So I'm running and running, and he's getting closer and closer, and then his horn gets me and my feet are off the ground, like I'm flying. Incredibly painful flying. Then he tosses me aside like a sock, and I'm on the pavement, and he gives me a couple of snorts and lumbers up the ramp and into his trailer.
Debra: Unbelievable! You were gored!
Frank: By a freakin' bull! Holy crap!
Features in the collection: Frank Barone: Holy Crap!.
Debra: That's why I want to go to counseling. I don't think it's that you're just lazy. I think there's a deeper reason behind this, and if we could just figure it out, you and I could be happier.
Ray: Come on, you know me. There's not much deepness. I just... I like to be taken care of.
Debra: You gotta understand, Ray, that that's not a wife. That's a mother.
Ray: Well, maybe that's what I want!
Frank: Holy crap!
Marie: So that's how you both fell? A race around the house, which you often do as a tradition?
Ray: Uh, yeah.
Frank: Stupid, humped-up termite trap!
[Frank falls through the stairs into the basement]
Marie: Oh, my God! Frank, are you all right?
Frank: [o.s.] Holy crap!
Marie: Don't move, I'm coming right down!
Frank: [o.s.] I'm in enough pain!
Quote from Robert
Debra: Where did he get you?
Robert: In my adductor magnus.
Frank: Your what?
Robert: It's my upper thigh area.
Ray: Sounds like he got you in the ass. [chuckles] I'm not- I'm not laughing. It's horrible, it's horrible. I'm not laughing.
Robert: It's upper thigh.
Marie: Oh, I hate all this police business. I always knew I'd get this call.
Ray: Really? The "your son has been gored in the ass by a bull" call?
Robert: It's upper thigh!
Quote from Marie
Frank: What happened?
Robert: Well, I yelled, "Hey, hey, bull!" I don't know. I guess I distracted him because he stopped cold. And then he turned. And then he started coming for me.
Debra: Oh, no!
Robert: Oh, yeah. It was like that Wall Street ad.
Frank: Or that malt liquor commercial.
Robert: Yeah. So he's coming towards me, and...
Marie: Did you get away?
Robert: [long silence] Where are we, Ma?