Frank Quote #58

Quote from Frank in Turkey or Fish

Ray: All right, Warren, what's the score? You're watching soccer?
Warren: Uruguay versus Venezuela.
Frank: [enters] Did anybody score while I was crossing the street? What the hell is this crap? That's soccer.
Warren: Frank, only in America is football the game that you're familiar with. In many countries, when people refer to ''footbalI'' they actually mean soccer.
Frank: In many countries, people eat cats. [changes the channel]

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 ‘Turkey or Fish’ Quotes

Quote from Ray

Ray: Come on, you're gonna hate it if they come. The first thing my father's gonna do is grab your turkey's butt, huh? That's not pretty.
Debra: Well, that's not gonna happen because this year, instead of turkey, I was thinking...
Ray: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, I'm sorry. Did you say ''instead of turkey''?
Debra: Yeah. I was thinking I would cook up this nice, big, fresh fish.
Ray: Fish?
Debra: Yeah, fish.
Ray: Fish on Thanksgiving?
Debra: Yeah. I mean, it's really better for you. I was gonna do this lovely striped bass.
Ray: Yeah, but a striped bass is a fish!

Quote from Ray

Ally: Ms. McCarthy told us that they had fish at the first Thanksgiving.
Debra: See?
Ray: Well, people were stupid then, sweetie.
Ray: Come on. Fish.
Debra: No. Look. I mean, we wanna start our own tradition, and we all like fish and Ally wants it to be like the first Thanksgiving.
Ray: Why don't we have some smallpox, too, then? Come on. What, are you crazy? You want me to convince my parents to come over here and my big sales pitch is "Mmm, mmm, Fish!"
Debra: But see, it makes sense, because your mom makes this great turkey. That's her specialty.
Ray: Right. And you do a great fish. Yes. But not on turkey day. Please. Try that on a day where there's less pressure. Pearl Harbor Day. Yeah, there's a good holiday for surprises.

 Frank Barone Quotes

Quote from Mother's Day

Frank: Let me ask you something, pal. What have you had, a tough week? Well, I've been living with your mother since... before you were born!
Ray: Debra wouldn't let the twins tell a "knock, knock" joke!
Frank: She's right! "Knock, knock" jokes stink!
Ray: That's not the point! Mom came over with her friends to show how cute the twins are telling a "knock, knock" joke, and Debra couldn't even give her that little of joy!
Frank: Well, who the hell is Marie to come barging in, demanding joy, when Debra's wrestling with the damn kids?
Ray: She didn't have to be so rude!
Frank: Rude is the only thing that gets through to her! How do you think I got the way I am? I used to be a gentleman!

Quote from Talk to Your Daughter

Debra: Will you please stop? It turns out Ally doesn't want to know how we get here, she wants to know why we're here, why God put us on Earth. And she's waiting for Ray to answer her.
Frank: What's wrong with you? It's simple.
Ray: Oh, okay. Yeah. We're gonna learn the meaning of life from a guy who once threw his shoe at a swan.
Frank: That's called protecting your sandwich. Listen to me. Here's what life is: you're born, you go to school, you go to work, you die. That's it. That's all. Cannoli, Marie!