Frank Quote #671

Quote from Frank in Grandpa Steals

Frank: So, uh, listen, Ally, I, uh... I understand you were mad or something about what happened at the supermarket. But what you don't understand is...
Ally: You took that stuff, and then you yelled at that man. It was scary.
Frank: Hey, listen... [Frank drops down the bench] You don't ever need to be scared of me. You see, what I did was take a little sample. And that's not stealing. In fact, they call it "sampling."
Ally: But the sign said "no sampling."
Frank: Oh, you're reading now. I'm proud of you. That's good. But, see, I think the sign is wrong. I think they should allow people to sample because that way, if you try it, you might want to buy it. But I could never get to that because of that jack... man.
Ally: You were yelling at him.
Frank: Oh, listen, Ally, people get mad at people sometimes. You get mad at people sometimes, like your little brothers there. They must be annoying as hell, am I right? So, anyway, I mean, when they really bother you, you yell at them just the way I yelled at the fruit guy. You know? But just because you yell at somebody, it doesn't mean you're a bad person. Does it? [Ally shakes her head] Right.
Ally: But if I do that, then I have to apologize to them.
Frank: Not all of the time.
Ally: Yeah, all the time.
Frank: Hey, you know what? I got your nose. But that's not stealing, it's only borrowing because I'm giving it back. [Ally is silent] I used to get a big laugh. You're too smart for that now. Hey, you know what? I'll see you later. [stands up] I'm not so scary, am I?
Ally: Not more than Grandma.

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 ‘Grandpa Steals’ Quotes

Quote from Marie

Ray: All right, look, Dad. We think you should know that Ally was kind of upset about what happened with the guy at the market.
Frank: Okay. Turn the TV back on.
Marie: Wait a second. What happened?
Frank: Aw, the jackass fruit guy accused me of stealing.
Marie: Frank, please! They're homosexuals.

Quote from Frank

Jimmy: Excuse me. No free sampling.
Frank: I'm not sampling. I've had this before.
Jimmy: Yeah, right. Well, it's not a snack bar.
Frank: Relax, pal, I just took a little.
Jimmy: Yeah, well, if everybody steals a little, the store goes a little bit out of business.
Frank: What, are you calling me a thief?
Jimmy: Only 'cause you're taking something without paying for it.
Frank: How much did I take, a nickel's worth? Here. Here's a quarter. Keep the change.
Jimmy: Don't throw money at me.
Frank: Oh, yeah? What are you gonna do?
Ray: Let's go, Dad. Sorry, I'm real sorry.
Frank: Hey, don't apologize for me. He's the one blowing a gasket over a handful of birdseed.
Jimmy: It's called stealing, cue ball!
Frank: I got hair, porky! Hey, don't turn your back on me, I'm standing right here.

Quote from Robert

Debra: Well, somebody needs to straighten him out.
Marie: No, leave him. He'll watch television, then I'll take him home, make some cannelloni, he'll burp, and he'll feel better.
Debra: You're an enabler. You're actually rewarding his horrible behavior with Italian food.
Robert: That's exactly how the mafia works.