Robert Quote #510

Quote from Robert in The Bigger Person

Robert: Raymond around?
Debra: No, he's out buying himself a new putter.
Robert: Isn't that nice for him? So, how are you?
Debra: I'm fine.
Robert: That's good. I'm glad one of us is fine.
Debra: You're not fine, Robert?
Robert: Well, you know me. I don't do well with the tension. It gets me right in the gut. And this thing with you and my mom... Muy tensionoso.
Debra: Is that Spanish for "very tense?"
Robert: I don't know. All I know is I'm popping antacids like they're cocktail peanuts.


 ‘The Bigger Person’ Quotes

Quote from Robert

Debra: What is it, Robert?
Robert: Well, maybe it's just me, but I'm of the opinion that a man should be more concerned about his family's well-being than figuring out a way to get his wife to let him go on a week-long golf retreat to Myrtle Beach.
Debra: What golf retreat?
Robert: Come on, you haven't noticed he's been dropping hints like crazy? Maybe that's because you're too busy running around gassing up his car, drinking wine, and having to... do things because of the wine.
Debra: Robert, all l-
Robert: Wake up, sis! Dad and Raymond have a laundry list of stuff they're trying to get out of you two! They're exploiting the situation, they're playing you two against each other, they're laughing at you, and it's making me sick! But if it doesn't bother you...

Quote from Robert

Robert: You know, they say you should never go to bed mad. Well, I say, it'd be even worse to go the Big Bed mad. Hmm? [Marie looks away] All right, Ma, there's something you should know. And I'm only saying this 'cause I don't wanna see you on the roof.

 Robert Barone Quotes

Quote from The Angry Family

Robert: [clears throat] Uh, if I may... You mentioned, Father Hubley, that I was not included in that book, and that is a very astute observation. And I do believe that my unique position in this... family, as that of an outsider, allows me to view this hodgepodge of life from a rather unique vantage point.
Ray: Top of a beanstalk?
Robert: And I do maintain that if anyone is to blame, Father, for this river of pent-up hostility that runs through this sorry bunch like you-know-what through a we-know-what... that person goes by the name... of Raymond.
Ray: Oh, sit down, you dope.
Robert: He is and always has been the center... the center of attention, the center of affection, he always gets the center chair in the kitchen. And this anger of which you speak, from the rest of these poor souls, stems from his unwillingness to share even the tiniest portion of the spotlight that shines, without end... on him.

Quote from Lucky Suit

Robert: Now I gotta go through my interview in an unlucky suit.
Marie: Just because you're not wearing your lucky suit doesn't mean that whatever you do wear will be unlucky.
Robert: Look at my life. All my other clothes are unlucky.