Marie: Well, pardon me for saying it, but isn't that a little hypocritical? I mean, here I am, ready to embrace this.
Lois: I know, and pardon me for saying this, but maybe in this case it really isn't up to you. I mean, well, heaven forbid you don't get your way for once. [laughs]
Marie: [faint chuckle] May I just ask, what the hell is that supposed to mean?
Lois: I'm just going by what I see around here.
Marie: At least I'm always here, not like some mothers.
Lois: Well, some mothers might say that you're here a little too much.

Ray: What's going on? What happened?
Debra: She rejected me.
Ray: What are you talking about?
Debra: Your mother. I went over there and I called her "Mom," and she turned me down.
Ray: Really?
Debra: I told her that I wanted to call her "Mom," and she just went, "That's all right."
Ray: Huh.
Debra: [hitting Ray with a pillow] Why did you make me do that?!
Ray: I didn't- I didn't make you do it! I was just trying to win an argument. I didn't think you would actually try it.
Debra: [resumes hitting Ray] I cannot believe her! She's unbelievable! Your mother is unbelievable!

Debra: Oh, good. You guys were there. Was that the most humiliating thing you have ever seen?
Robert: Brutal, Raymond.
Frank: I felt bad for you, sweetheart. Had trouble finishing my lunch.
Ray: What happened? After she said no, what did you do?
Debra: Just sat there like an idiot.
Robert: Us, too.
Debra: Marie just went about her business as if nothing had happened.
Robert: I know how you feel, Deb. That's just how she is. Only certain people are allowed in the pantheon of affection: the Pope, Frank Sinatra, Placido Domingo, and Raymond. You just gotta let it go. That's all. You gotta let it go!
Ray: Yeah. Like he did.
Robert: I know what. Maybe I'll start calling her "Marie." Bet she wouldn't even notice. "Hello, Marie." "Hello, Robbie. Have you seen Placido Domingo? Or Raymond?"