Ray Quote #1030
Quote from Ray in The Author
Debra: You know Robert never gets anything and the one time that he does, what do you do? You slam the table and you walk out of the room, you big baby.
Ray: Yeah, I'm a baby, and you're a baby-marrier. All right, I slammed the table. So?
Debra: All right, here's what's going to happen. You're going to go over there tomorrow and congratulate Robert on his success. So at least you can look in the mirror and maybe see an adult.
Ray: At least I don't see what Robert sees when he looks in the mirror a stupid giant with a new sweater that looks like yarn... vomit. I can't even write my own talk.
Everybody Loves Raymond Quotes
‘The Author’ Quotes
Quote from Frank
Frank: Hey, those are my Bugles.
Ray: Good thing your mother's here.
Robert: Yeah, right.
Frank: A whole box of Bugles.
Marie: Look at this carpet. And the lamp! This is why we can't have nice things! Everybody makes a mess, and I have to fix it up! All the time. Great, all the time.
Robert: Oh, oh, oh! My back! My back! My back!
Ray: Oh, my neck thing.
Frank: You two idiots. I hope you're happy! I have to eat Funyuns now! Marie, Funyuns!
Quote from Robert
Ray: You've been rubbing it in my face this whole time!
Robert: Yeah, like you haven't been doing that to me for the past 40 years.
Ray: Oh, how long are you going to sing that song, huh?! You've been acting like a jerk! Why don't you just admit it?!
Robert: Oh, yeah? I'm a jerk? Who was the one who instead of saying, "Hey, I'm happy for you, brother," threw a hissy fit and stormed out of the room?
Ray: Hey, for your information, if you remember, I said, "Great!" Okay? All right? And if I was upset, I had a reason to, okay? 'Cause you waited until my lifetime dream got crushed before you made your big announcement!
Robert: Oh yeah? How'd it feel? 'Cause you know what? I hope it felt really bad.
Ray: Oh, you do, huh? You do?
Robert: Yeah, I do! I hope it felt the same way you make me feel every time you prance over to Mom and Dad's to tell them about one of your great accomplishments!
Ray: Hey, if I do that, it's because up until now, nobody else had accomplishments!
Robert: Well, now someone does! And that's got to be killing you, huh, Ray?
Ray: Shut up!
Robert: You know, 'cause I was thinking, Ray, that a lot of books get published that suck. So for your book not to get published... Woo, that's got to be off-the-charts suck.
Quote from Debra
Ray: Where have you been for the last hour?
Debra: I told you I was going to the store.
Ray: What, they make you lock up?
Debra: Excuse me?
Ray: How can I write when this whole place is crawling with doodie-heads?
Debra: Oh, were they noisy? Gosh, when I'm alone with them, they just sit in the corner and read the Bible.
Ray: Listen, come here. Sit down for one second, please. Just sit down. I want to tell you something. I need help, okay? I'm under the gun here to finish a chapter, so I was wondering if you could kind of pick up the slack here till I'm done.
Debra: My whole life is picking up the slack.