Ray: We should put something in there that if I die you can't marry another man named Ray.
David Atkins: Excuse me?
Ray: Well, 'cause eventually everyone would call him Ray and me "Dead Ray."
David Atkins: I don't think I can-
Debra: Just ignore him.

Debra: All right, I'm sorry. So the salt didn't stay on your pretzel.
Ray: Yes! All right, so I'm... I'm bending down to wipe the salt off my shirt, and bam, a foul ball comes flying into the booth. It came this close to hitting me!
Debra: Yeah?
Ray: Yeah! I felt its wind! And then I turn and Andy, who just got a turkey and cheese sandwich, and the ball knocks it off his tray. The soda, pickles, chips, chocolate cake, everything!
Debra: You get chocolate cake in the press box?
Ray: It was Friday. We get a different cake every Friday. But you're missing the point.
Debra: No, I'm getting the point. A ball bounced into your world and disturbed paradise!

Robert: [enters] Ma wanted me to tell you she's making frittatas.
Debra: Robert, you have a will, right?
Robert: Why? What did you hear? Is that why Ma's making frittatas?
Debra: No, Ray and I were talking about wills, and he doesn't want to make one.
Robert: Oh, why not?
Debra: He thinks it's gonna tempt fate.
Robert: No, no, no, silly. If you don't have a will you're tempting fate. "I don't need a will. I'm gonna live forever." Manhole!
Ray: I don't know.
Robert: Raymond, listen to me. You need to have a will and eat a fibrous breakfast every morning and nothing can touch you.