Frank: Let me tell you something, when I came back from Korea, I had no money, no skills. Sure I was good with a bayonet. But you can't put that in a resume, it puts people off. I had nothing!
Ray: You had Mom. [Frank shrugs] Sorry.
Frank: I worked in a restaurant, a meatpacking plant, a bowling alley, and they all ended the same way with the same lame-ass excuse: "Broke too many dishes", "Too slow with the giblets", "I'm sorry, you've been replaced by a machine that rolls the ball back."
Ray: You were an accountant.
Frank: Yeah, by the time you came along, I was an accountant. Not even an accountant, bookkeeper.
Ray: So? So what? That's a good career.
Frank: That's a job! You think I liked it? Sitting there all day? And then the traffic, the idiots. That is life. And you've got to be tough. I tried to show you that.

Frank: Take all the skin off my head, it still wouldn't cover Ray's nose.
Ray: Yeah well, I wish it would 'cause then I wouldn't have to smell your head without the skin on it.
Robert: What's that supposed to mean?
Ray: It means, shut up, that's what it means.
Marie: I don't like that, Raymond.
Ray: Well, you too.
Marie: Ooh! [Marie switches to Frank's side]
Ray: Sorry, I'm sorry.
Frank: I actually liked you on the other side better. Because the tilt of the basement was working in my favor. [Marie returns to Raymond's side]

Marie: Talk dirty to your father.
Ray: What?!
Marie: Say ass.
Ray: Mom, come on.
Frank: Come on, Ray, you're gonna talk some more trash to me?
Ray: No, I don't know. I'm distracted by the shine off your scalp. [Robert & Marie laugh]
Marie: That's good one, Raymond. 'Cause you're bald.