Frank Quote #165
Ray: Dad, you sure I can't be on your side at this thing?
Frank: I told you, the South's a few guys short. Look, try yanking from the heel, okay?
Ray: I kind of thought I'd be on your side in this thing, you know? With you.
Frank: Look, I know what you're worried about. If we should come face to face out there, I'll just shoot you in the hand, all right? Ah, you're twisting. What's the matter with you?
Ray: Either I'm on your side in this thing, or I'm not gonna go.
Frank: You can't desert now.
Ray: There's no desert, Dad. There's no war here! It's just dressing up in costumes like it's Halloween with your friend Harry/Jeb.
Frank: You shut up now. This means something to us. There's camaraderie here. There's spirit. You don't understand anything about this! You have no idea what it feels like to stand on a battlefield pretending to fight for something you believe in!
Everybody Loves Raymond Quotes
‘Civil War’ Quotes
Quote from Frank
Frank: All right. This house is secure. I want lunch.
Harry: May I escort you across the street, Miss Marie?
Marie: Thank you, Jeb. What a gentleman.
Frank: Hey, if you're gonna act like you're stealing her away, don't tease me. Steal her away!
Quote from Robert
Ray: You're this big Civil War freak now, just because Dad asked you to go first?
Robert: He didn't ask me.
Ray: What?
Robert: He didn't ask me. Since when does Dad ask us to do anything with him? I had to enlist.
Ray: God, I don't believe this. I only did this because.
Robert: Because you thought he asked me and not you. And now you have to go. [laughs] Hey, better bring a newspaper.
Ray: They had newspapers then.
Robert: They didn't have toilet paper.
Quote from Frank
Frank: Ah, my feet are killing me. I think these boots are a size too small. Tell me, what's it say on the bottom of my right boot?
Ray: "Left."
Frank: Oh, crap. What's it say on the other one?
Ray: Guess.