Debra: Hey, Ray, you know you might have a relative still living in Italy?
Ray: [flatly] Yeah? Great.
Debra: Hey, you know what? You might be able to use the paper's research facilities to find her. [off Ray's bored look] Come on, she's family.
Ray: [looks at Frank] Wait a minute. Why would we want to locate more of these people?

Debra: Come on. You know a little Italian, don't you?
Ray: Hardly any.
Marie: No, Frank and I only spoke Italian when we were arguing so that the boys wouldn't understand.
Robert: We're almost fluent.

Frank: Turn it. Would you turn it?
Ray: No, get out of here.
Frank: Put the other game on.
Ray: Go to your house.
Frank: You don't flip around enough. You don't deserve satellite TV.
Ray: Dad, I'm covering the game for work.
Frank: Oh, jeezalou, you can read about it in the paper.
Ray: You know yet that I'm a sports writer? I am the paper.

Ally: Grandpa, will you help me with my homework?
Frank: Nope.
Debra: Frank.
Frank: How else is she gonna learn? Nobody handed me any answers.
Debra: Clearly.

Marie: What are you doing? Can't you feel this? It's too hot.
Frank: That's your damn change of life.
Marie: I went through that 10 years ago.
Frank: Then how about a change of personality?

Debra: So technically we're not related, but she can still stay.
Marie: Her real family wants to see her.
Ray: I finally had a favorite relative. There's not even a runner-up.

Marie: Hi, Debra.
Debra: Hi, Marie.
Marie: My, it's hot in here. Are you baking? What am I saying?

Marie: This is what happens when Frank fixes things. You remember the chimney, Robbie?
Robert: Yeah. I told him I was too big.

Ray: Who is this?
Debra: It's Zia Sarina.
Ray: Who?
Debra: Your aunt from Italy.
Ray: What?
Debra: Yeah.
Ray: Why?
Debra: You kind of invited her.
Ray: When?
Debra: In the letter. You said, "If you're ever in America, come visit us."
Ray: So she hops on a plane. Who does that?
Marie: A person who cares about family.

Robert: Did you know we had an ancestor who was a count? She said I look just like him. That's right.