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‘Marie and Frank's New Friends’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

Everybody Loves Raymond: Marie and Frank's New Friends

419. Marie and Frank's New Friends

Aired March 20, 2000

Ray and Debra encourage Frank and Marie to make new friends.

Quote from Frank

Frank: The house is now paid off. And here's to the wonderful people at Lynbrook Mortgage. Thanks for the calendars, and you can all kiss my great American ass.
Debra: Grandpa, Grandpa.
Frank: Oh, oh, sorry, kids. Don't say ass. Hey, that was fun.
Debra: Yeah!
Frank: Now let's have a real party. Marie, go get our marriage license.
Marie: You know, now that the place is all ours, I can't wait to redecorate and get rid of some of that old stuff. So long, Frank.

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Quote from Ray

Robert: Ma, Dad, congratulations. The house becomes part of your estate which in the old country would be passed down to the firstborn son.
Ray: In the old country, you'd be working in the circus.

Quote from Ray

Ray: Hey, hey, it's the monkeys!
Ally: Hi, Daddy.
Debra: Yay, Daddy's home! How was Chicago?
Ray: What are you saying, I'm cheating on you? Is that it? She means nothing! I missed you. I miss all that fun stuff.
Ally: Daddy, what did you bring us?
Ray: What did I bring you? Um... Well, let's see, got something. I brought you something. Okay, for Michael some lovely: apricot shampoo. Ahh. For Geoffrey, conditioner! Mmm. All imported from the enchanted isle of Marriott. You having trouble getting your shoes on, Ally? Not anymore!
Debra: Ray.
Ray: Don't worry, I didn't forget you, my darling. For Mommy, something as sweet as she is some fine candies.
Debra: Aw, the mints from your pillow.
Ray: Yeah. As part of the hotel's turn-down service.
Debra: Well, tonight you're gonna get my turn-down service.
Ray: Well, I guess Mommy doesn't want peanuts from the sky.

Quote from Robert

Debra: Hi, everybody!
Marie: Oh, there you are!
Frank: What took you so long?
Robert: Yeah, you're just coming from across the street.
Ray: Yeah, well, I got confused and went to where I wished you lived.

Quote from Debra

Debra: Hey, listen, you know what your mom told me at that party? They don't have any friends.
Ray: You sound surprised.
Debra: Well, it's kind of sad. It's kind of sad.
Ray: Well, it's not sad for the people who would have to be their friends.
Debra: Except we have to be their friends.
Ray: That is a little sad.
Debra: Yeah. Look, we're their whole lives! It occurred to me that if they had more friends, we'd have less them.
Ray: Have you worked out a budget for this?

Quote from Frank

Frank: All right, break it up.
Ray: Oh, what do you want? We just saw you.
Marie: We just brought you some leftovers.
Ray: They don't qualify as leftovers if they're still warm.
Frank: Let's watch some highlights.
Marie: Frank, you already watched this game.
Frank: So I know how good the highlights will be. Let's not ruin these by talking.

Quote from Debra

Ray: Listen, we were on our way out, right?
Debra: Yes.
Marie: Wait, wait, wait, where are you going?
Debra: We're just going out to dinner. You guys make yourselves at home. Marie knows where everything is.
She put it there.

Quote from Robert

Robert: A common misconception is that a bull will charge when shown the color red. Actually, it's motion.

Quote from Marie

Debra: So, Marie, what happened? I thought you were gonna have a big party to celebrate.
Marie: It is a party. I made bruschetta.
Debra: Oh, I thought when you said you were having a party that would include... I don't know, some friends.
Marie: Oh, who has time for friends? Have a deviled egg, dear.
Debra: What do you mean, you don't have time for friends?
Marie: Well, after you and Raymond moved in, I mean, someone had to help you raise a family. So we just had to give up some things.
Debra: Your social life?
Marie: Well, we still have a social life.
[Frank unbuttons his pants]
Ray: Ma, Robert's eating all the deviled eggs, won't give me any.
Robert: They don't feed us enough in the circus.

Quote from Ray

Ray: Hey, did my father give Geoffrey some wine today?
Debra: No, why?
Ray: 'Cause I was putting him to bed, and he said, "I love you, man."

Quote from Ray

Debra: Ahem, so, gosh, Marie, it must feel so liberating to own the house now, huh?
Marie: Yeah.
Debra: Gosh, think of all the things you can do now, like you could entertain more.
Frank: Geez, we just had a party. What are we, Studio 54?
Debra: No, really, you deserve your own social life. Especially now that all your house obligations are over, and we seem to be managing. Now might be the perfect time for you to say, "Hi, neighbor!"
Frank: [holds up TV remote] I got all the friends I need right here.
Marie: You see, Debra? I would love to start entertaining again, but if we have guests, what am I supposed to do with this?
Ray: Tell them that you lost a bet, and you've got to clean and feed him for another year.

Quote from Frank

Debra: Come on. We all know that Frank can be a lot of fun. Hey, you know who else is a lot of fun? The Mauers next door.
Marie: I like the Mauers.
Frank: No can do.
Debra: Why not?
Frank: Because I may or may not recently have flipped one of them the bird. [off Marie's look] What? He was trying to put a piece of garbage in our garbage can.
Marie: Well, that's no reason to flip them a bird.
Frank: Hey, I can't have the garbage man thinking I dye my hair.
Marie: Oh, so then all that is natural?

Quote from Ray

Ray: Hey, you know who's cool? The Stipes.
Debra: Yes, the Stipes! Who?
Ray: You remember, those old nice people that Robert lived with first time he moved out. If they're still alive, they're very friendly.
Frank: I ran into the husband in the hardware store. He's actually not a jerk.
Debra: Well, see? It sounds like you guys would have a blast together!
Ray: You probably would.
Marie: But what are we supposed to do with these Stipes? I don't know, you could invite them over for dinner or drinks.
Ray: You could play "Guess What I Forgot."

Quote from Frank

Marie: What about a board game?
Debra: Yes, yes, a board game. Great idea.
Marie: Oh, that's a good idea, Debra. Frank, we're having company.
Frank: They better like swearing.

Quote from Ray

Ray: I know that dance. That's the l-wanna-have-sex-with-Ray dance. And here's my if-you-insist dance.
What are you- Don't laugh.

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