Dr. Nora: So, Ray, what's it like having three children under the age of five?
Ray: Well, I like to tell people it's kind of like a frat house. Nobody sleeps, everything's broken and there's a lot of throwing up.
Dr. Nora: Can I quote you?
Ray: Oh, you like that?
Dr. Nora: Yeah, I do.
Debra: [over baby monitor] Get back in that crib now!
Ray: Said the mama bear to the three little bears. She tells great stories, Debra.

Frank: So you're a radio doctor, huh? You wouldn't think you'd have to be on the radio with that figure.
Marie: Frank!
Frank: It's a compliment.
Ray: Yeah, he used to write for Hallmark.
Marie: You still don't know how to behave do you?
Frank: Hey, leave me alone. I'm talking.
Marie: You're not talking. You're embarrassing. You always do that to me. Like with Lee and Stan in the restaurant.
Frank: I'm not listening anymore, [sings] doodah doodah.

Robert: [enters] Hello.
Marie: Oh, Robert, I want you to meet Dr. Nora, the famous psychologist from the radio.
Dr. Nora: Hello.
Robert: ls this about me?

Marie: Hello, dear.
Debra: Hi.
Marie: What's for dinner?
Debra: It's turkey dogs.
Marie: Turkey dogs? What an interesting choice!
Debra: I have them every week.
Frank: That's totally... insane.
Debra: What?
Marie: What he means is you've got some imagination there, Debra.

Ray: Congratulations on that Super Bowl MVP thing.
Desmond Howard: Thanks. I saw your article about it. Thought it was great.
Ray: I wish you were my boss.
Desmond Howard: What? He didn't like it?
Ray: Yeah.
Desmond Howard: How did you hand it in?
Ray: I... I gave it to him.
Desmond Howard: That's it? When you do a good job you've got to let them know. When I do my job well, I let everybody know. I slow down at the 5-yard line I start doing a little robot spike the ball. Everybody's in the crowd feeling it.
Ray: That's showboating.
Debra: No, man, that's sharing the moment. That's letting people know you've got something special. Now, I'm your boss. Give me your article. Mean it this time.
Ray: What do you mean?
Desmond Howard: I mean show me what you've got.
Ray: I didn't come with much, really.
Desmond Howard: Ray, show me something. [all laugh at Ray] Well, maybe you should just hand it in with a smile.

Ray: You're talking about me to some radio shrink?
Debra: Honey, she's one of the most respected psychotherapists in the country. I was lucky to get through.
Ray: Well, what did you say to her?
Debra: I called because some other caller was saying how she didn't feel appreciated. Some hooker from Dallas.
Ray: Wait a minute. So you don't feel appreciated?
Debra: Well, it's just that we don't get to spend a lot of time together and Dr. Nora says that can lead to feeling unappreciated.
Ray: Oh, what the hell is she talking about? I appreciate you. By the way, thanks for everything.
Debra: Yeah, yeah.

Debra: You have to be here, Ray. The book's about families. She loves to ask really tough questions so we got to get our story straight.
Ray: Stories straight? What'd we do, knock over a 7-Eleven?
Debra: Okay, that's exactly the kind of thing that is going to kill us: "your sense of humor".

Debra: And this is my daughter Ally.
Dr. Nora: Hello. What are you drawing there Ally?
Ally: Naked Barbie.
Debra: Honey, why don't we draw Barbie building something?
Ray: She could still be naked.
Ally: [to Dr. Nora] Can you go soon?

Ray: Look company.
Debra: Ray, come here. Dr. Nora is here to talk to me not to Peaches & Herb.
Ray: I'm going to get rid of them.
Debra: Please.
Ray: Don't call my mother Herb.

Ray: Hey. [Debra is silent] All right, I am no expert in body language but stop yelling.
Debra: Dr. Nora was supposed to be here for me, not your family, and by the end she didn't even know I was in the room.
Ray: I am sure she did. Who do you think was bringing her all that pie? Of course she was interested in them.
Some shrinks got to go to 40 institutions to find all the action she found in that room.