Vanessa: What are you doing over here?
Julius: Uh, listen. Everybody in the neighborhood's been winning on the games. Are you sure about the tips you've been getting?
Vanessa: Sure as fried fish is greasy.
Julius: Who's giving the tips, anyway?
Vanessa: I don't know, but he's good. Doc hasn't lost a bet yet.
Julius: Can you put this on the game for me?
Vanessa: Oh, okay.
Julius: And don't tell Rochelle.
Vanessa: Oh, no, wait a minute now; I'm not comfortable with that. I can't lie to my friend.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] You told her that perm looked good.
Julius: Look, I'm not asking you to lie. I'm just saying... keep quiet.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] She'll keep it quiet, just like Paul Revere.
Julius: I'll tell her when I win.
Vanessa: All right, now, you better tell her, or I'll have to.

Vanessa: Tonya? Ooh, where did you get all those eggs? Did you hijack a chicken?
Tonya: I've just been looking really hard.
Vanessa: Well, where's Chris?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Think fast, woman.
Tonya: Uh, he's looking for eggs.
Vanessa: Well, we need to find him. Drew sprained his ankle, so he needs to escort your mother to the hat show. Come on, girl. [Tonya doesn't move] Come on, girl!

Rochelle: Okay, Peaches. All right, girl. Well, I will see you later...
Peaches: Oh, speaking of later. Girl, I need a touch-up. Tasha's staying with friends tonight. I'm going out with this guy, and I need to look good.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Then you better not show him your tattoos.
Vanessa: Don't show him your tattoos.
Rochelle: You got tattoos?
Peaches: I was in jail.
Vanessa: I'll squeeze you in. Sit down.
Peaches: Oh, girl, thank you.

Vanessa: I know you. You the one been messing with Doc.
Stacy: I am not "messing" with Doc. We're a couple. And that's a little bit different than a mess.
Rochelle: Not too much.
Stacy: Excuse me?
Rochelle: You're excused.
Vanessa: Okay, I'm gonna have to ask you to leave. I'm sorry. We can't help you.
Stacy: Yes, you are sorry. And you don't need to help me. You need to help yourself.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I know you are, but what am I?

Vanessa: I got you a computer.
Rochelle: A computer? For what?
Vanessa: To keep the salon organized. It holds customer information, appointments, calculate our accounts receivable and payable. It does just about everything but hair.
Rochelle: Oh, I don't need a computer. Girl, I'm a walking computer.
Vanessa: But I'm not. Girl, I don't even know what's going on in my own salon anymore.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Sounds like my father.
Vanessa: Try it! You'll like it.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] That sounds like my father, too.

Rochelle: Do you have a problem with me?
Vanessa: What? No. Why would you ask me that?
Rochelle: Because you keep embarrassing me in front of people. And Peaches is in there acting like she's Albert Einstein with my kids. Now, if you want to replace me, then just say so.
Vanessa: Rochelle, you're being ridiculous.
Rochelle: How would you feel if I bought a computer here that knew how to do hair and she knew how to work it and you didn't?
Vanessa: Rochelle, you sound like a crazy woman. Now, if you don't want her helping with the computer, fine. But you better learn it fast, 'cause the person that manages this store is going to be working on that computer.