Chris Quote #431
Quote from Chris in Everybody Hates Ex-Cons
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Typically, in the barbershop, I heard good news.
Manny: Did you hear? They renewed The Jeffersons for another season. I love me some Weezie, boy. Whoo!
Manny: Did you hear the Voyager space probe had its first encounter with Uranus?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] But on this day, I got the worst news I could imagine.
Manny: Did y'all hear? Malvo is out of prison.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Malvo was the career criminal that I had helped put away. But like the Terminator, everybody knew he'd be back, and they were ready.
Risky: Shoot, I put extra locks on my doors.
James: I put two locks on my bike.
Monk: I locked up my locks.
Chris: I ain't scared of Malvo.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] This is called "barbershop courage."
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates Ex-Cons’ Quotes
Quote from Manny
Manny: Well, the man was asking for your help, and you turned him down. Sometimes people need a hand. Now, back when I had troubles, if it wasn't for Supercuts Johnson, I don't know where I'd be today.
Risky: Supercuts Johnson? Who's that?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Anywhere relation to Jehri Curl Johnson?
Manny: He was a barber when I was doing time in prison. He used to cut hair on death row.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Why would you want to get your hair cut when you're on death row?
James: You was in the joint?
Manny: Oh, yeah.
Monk: Man, what'd you do?
Manny: You know that tag on the mattress that says "Do not pull off"? I pulled that thing off. Do not pull that tag off, man. They are not playing with y'all.
Quote from Ms. Morello
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Since I didn't know how to get Malvo past the eighth grade, I decided to ask a professional.
Ms. Morello: Chris, this is wonderful. You're like a one-man Operation PUSH.
Chris: Thank you.
Ms. Morello: And Malvo, with the proper education, you can do so many things. You could be a garbage collector, garbage truck driver, garbage truck dispatcher. The list is endless.
Chris: So what do you think we should do next?
Ms. Morello: I've got an idea. Why don't you sit in - which your people have historically been good at - and audit my class?
Malvo: "Audit" means to attend classes or lectures as an auditor. Auditor means "hearer" or "listener."
Quote from Ms. Morello
Chris: So, how would that help him?
Ms. Morello: Well, if he's preparing for an equivalency test, he needs classroom experience. It'll help him get acclimated.
Malvo: Acclimated: "to accustom or to become accustomed to a new climate or an environment."
Ms. Morello: [laughs]
Chris: Thank you, Miss Morello.
Malvo: Yes, thank you.
Ms. Morello: Chris, I think this is a great way for you to get your father off the streets.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] And in her bed.