Adult Chris Quote #277
Quote from Adult Chris in Everybody Hates Driving
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My father's trust made me feel like a man... and so did this.
Tasha: Hey, Chris. You driving now?
Chris: Yeah, so if you ever need a ride someplace, just let me know.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Especially if that someplace is across the street.
Tasha: Well, maybe we could take a ride after school.
Chris: Maybe. Look, I got to go, I don't want to hit traffic.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] At that moment, I had a decision to make: drive across the street and look like a fool or drive around the corner and feel real cool. [car starts] If Greg were here, he'd say I was in there.
More Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates Driving’ Quotes
Quote from Julius
Julius: Good, and make sure you put on your seat belt.
Chris: I will.
Julius: And don't touch my mirrors.
Chris: I won't.
Julius: Don't move my seat.
Julius: Warm up the engine.
Julius: And don't go burning up gas.
Chris: I'm just moving the car across the street.
Julius: That's three cents worth of gas.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] By the time this checklist was over, I had had a license, a diploma, and had made my third appearance on Showtime At The Apollo.
Quote from Julius
Adult Chris: [v.o.] When I got older, I was always asking my dad to let me drive.
Chris: Hey, Dad, can I drive?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] And he always said the same thing.
Julius: Drive? Sure, you can drive... as soon as you turn 16, go to driver's ed., get a driver's license, graduate from high school, get a job, get out of my house, get a car, get insurance. Yeah, then you can drive anytime you want.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] He could have just said no.
Adult Chris Quotes
Quote from Everybody Hates Jail
Chris: It wasn't me. I go to Corleone Junior High. I got the cookies from school, and I'm just selling them so I can go on some trip to Washington, DC. And I did not steal them. I was just saying that so people would want to buy them.
Russo: You go to Corleone? What are you the only Black kid there? Nice try. There was an eyewitness, and you fit the profile, cookie boy.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I may have only been 13, but I already knew how racial profiling worked. This is what the witness said...
Man: He was a Black male, medium complexion, about 6'4, 230 pounds. He had brown eyes. Um, he was wearing a Scout uniform with a yellow beanie, and he had on dark pants, and size 14 dark shoes. And, uh, a birthmark on the back of his left wrist. Oh, and... And he walked with a limp.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] But this is what the cop heard...
Man: Um, he was Black, and, uh, Black, Black, and Black. Um, Black, Black, and he Black, Black, Black, Black, Black, Black. And, uh, he had, uh, Black, Black, Black, Black. And, oh, a Black. Yeah. And, uh, he walked with a Black.
Quote from Everybody Hates Keisha
Tonya: Ooh, I'm telling.
Drew: Shut up, Tonya.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Usually, when Tonya said she was telling, that meant I was getting in trouble. But I didn't care. All I wanted to do was slap the black off of Drew.
[fantasy: Drew's face has a patchy complexion as he is carried into an ambulance on a stretcher:]
Detective: What happened?
Police Officer: Looks like the older brother came home, found the little brother kissing his woman and slapped the black off him.
Detective: [holding an evidence back] Is this the black?
Police Officer: All we could find.
Detective: So much for brotherly love.