Ms. Morello Quote #26
Quote from Ms. Morello in Everybody Hates the Guidance Counselor
Ms. Morello: Chris, after looking at your test results, I'm very concerned.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I'd been getting my ass whooped for two years and now she's concerned?
Chris: What are you concerned about?
Ms. Morello: You did horribly on your test. With that on your record, it could seriously harm your chances of going to college, even if you get a basketball scholarship.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Is she crazy? There's no grades they won't take if you can play basketball.
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates the Guidance Counselor’ Quotes
Quote from Manny
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My dad didn't go to college and neither did my mother, so I tried to find out if I knew anybody who did.
Chris: Hey, Manny, did you ever go to college?
Manny: Always wanted to, but I found out I couldn't.
Chris: Why not?
Manny: I had this thing called "extenuating circumstances."
Mr. Omar: Like what?
Manny: I never finished high school. So I got a job here and when Manny died, I took over.
Chris: Wait, you had the same name as the owner?
Manny: No, no, no, my name was Lester. But I had to make a choice: change the sign or change my name. And that sign was expensive.
Quote from Chris
Mr. Abbott: Okay, let's start. Father.
Chris: Tired.
Mr. Abbott: Mother.
Chris: Bald.
Mr. Abbott: Excuse me?
Chris: Sorry. I was still on "father."
Mr. Abbott: Thank God. I thought you had a bald mother.
Quote from Greg
Adult Chris: [v.o.] While my mother was throwing clothes in the box, Greg was thinking outside the box.
Mr. Abbott: You did unbelievable on this test. There's a lot of things you could do when you get out of college.
Greg: At first, I was thinking I could start up an investment banking firm, or maybe franchise a coffee store.
Mr. Abbott: "Franchise a coffee store"? That is the dumbest idea I've ever heard in my life. A store that sells nothing but coffee? Well, what you going to open up next? A place that sells nothing but staples? Oh, what's after that? A place that sells everything for 99 cents? [sniffs] You smell anything?
Greg: Well, see that's what I was going to tell you. I settled on being an astronaut. I'm... I'm wearing a diaper.
Mr. Abbott: A diaper?! You mean, you want to fly a rocket, but you're still gonna pee in your pants?
Greg: Well, they don't make you do it but I wanted to see if I could take it.
Mr. Abbott: Nobody could take it, Greg. Now, get the funk out of my office. [sniffing] Gah!