Joey Caruso Quote #28
Quote from Joey Caruso in Everybody Hates the Buddy System
Chris: Okay, we can catch the next train, and we'll be back in no time.
Joey Caruso: I spent all my money on food.
Chris: Okay, fine, I think I have enough money to get two tokens. So let's go.
Joey Caruso: Who put you in charge?
Chris: I'm just trying to get us back to school.
Joey Caruso: Just let me make the decisions.
Chris: Why should I do that?
Joey Caruso: How many times do I have to punch you before you get a clue? Don't you watch the movies? Gene Wilder made all the decisions in Silver Streak. Richard Pryor just followed orders.
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates the Buddy System’ Quotes
Quote from Drew
Julius: I'm really proud of you for getting 100 on that test, so here you go.
Drew: Yeah! Wow.
Julius: Huh? What do you think?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Drew thought about saying this...
[fantasy:]
Drew: Gritsky? It's not Gritsky. It's Gretzky with an "E"! I scored 100 on my spelling test. I can't wear this! You got that big old head, and you can't even spell Gretzky. [scoffs] Maybe you should take my spelling classes. I ain't wearing this.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] But if he did, here's what would've happened...
[fantasy: Drew is carried out of the house on a stretcher:]
Detective: What's the story?
Police Officer: Apparently, the kid loves hockey. Father brings home a jersey that says Gritsky with an "I" instead of Gretzky with an "E." Son mouths off, dad loses it, shoves the jersey down the kid's throat.
Detective: Is that the jersey?
Police Officer: It's all we could find.
Detective: Good thing he didn't ask for skates.
Quote from Julius
Julius: [answers phone] Hello?
Operator: I have a collect call from... [Julius quickly hangs up the phone]
Julius: Whew. Whew.
Quote from Julius
Drew: Hey, Dad, check it out. I got a hundred on my spelling test.
Julius: All right. My man!
Drew: I was thinking... Could I get a hockey jersey, since I got a hundred on my test?
Julius: You're supposed to get a hundred, you don't get a prize for doing well.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My father never rewarded good behavior.
[fantasy:]
Chris: Dad, I cleaned out the tub.
Julius: You're supposed to clean the tub, it's your dirt ring.
[fantasy:]
Tonya: Hey, Dad. I fixed the heater.
Julius: You're supposed to fix the heater. You're the one who likes it warm.
[fantasy:]
Drew: Hey, Dad, I slaughtered a pig.
Julius: You're supposed to slaughter a pig. You're the one that likes bacon.