Doc Quote #9
Quote from Doc in Everybody Hates Malvo
Doc: I knew it, I knew it! I knew I shouldn't have left. Twenty two years, I've never left that cashier's alone with anyone else. Yeah, yeah. Since the store opened. And the one day I do, I get robbed.
Chris: Sorry Doc, I was going to hit with the bamboo stick but he took it.
Doc: Chris, look, it's not your fault. He had a gun. I much rather you get robbed than shot. My pickled eggs. He took my pickled eggs. Now, who steals pickled eggs?
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates Malvo’ Quotes
Quote from Rochelle
Julius: What?
Rochelle: "I'm just trying to tape my stories, blah, blah, blah." Julius, she's eleven, she made a mistake.
Julius: So what? Now, I can't get mad? You get mad all the time!
Rochelle: Exactly. But everybody's used to it. If I did half the things I threaten to do, don't you think I would have been in jail a long time ago?
[fantasy: Rochelle is in a jail cell with another woman:]
Prisoner: What are you in for?
Rochelle: Knocking my kids' nostrils off.
Quote from Doc
Doc: Now, come on, let's finish up these sketches.
Chris: Yeah, so, how did you learn to do this anyway?
Doc: I started painting nude portraits to meet chicks. Then I got good at it.
Chris: A little darker under the eyes.
Doc: Okay. Now, is that him?
Chris: Yeah, that's him.
Doc: Chris, that's Al Jarreau. Come on now, you got to focus. Every time we do this, it comes out different. Now, first time, this one looked like... Yeah, ain't that look like Kareem Abdul-Jabbar? And that's George Jefferson. And ain't that Lionel Richie? Come on Chris. Let's just start over.
Quote from Julius
Julius: Hey, everybody. I got a surprise. A Betamax.
Drew: Didn't they stop making those?
Julius: They sure did. That's how I got it for half off.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] The only time my father ever brought something new home was when it was old to everybody else.
[flashback:]
Rochelle: I asked for a sewing-machine! What the hell is this?
Julius: A loom.
[flashback:]
Rochelle: What is that?
Julius: A Stove.
Rochelle: Well, if that's a stove, where's the witch?
[flashback:]
Rochelle: I asked for a car. What the hell is this?
Julius: A rickshaw. That's Rick. [An Asian man waves]