Vanessa Quote #30

Quote from Vanessa in Everybody Hates Big Bird

Vanessa: Rochelle, I'll have you know I have a very precise system that's worked for nine months.
Rochelle: Really? What is it?
Vanessa: Every time the Jets win, I use my green toothbrush.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Four out of five dentists think she's crazy.
Gloria: And I pluck three mole hairs before every game.
Shay: And I been eating two chicken-fried bananas before every game.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Just two?

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 ‘Everybody Hates Big Bird’ Quotes

Quote from Julius

Chris: The only thing is, she's a little awkward-looking.
Julius: Awkward? Like she has one leg longer than the other?
Chris: No.
Julius: Like she dislocated her shoulder and they put it back wrong?
Chris: No.
Julius: Like her eyes are too far apart?
Chris: No.
Julius: Like she's knock-kneed and pigeon-toed, and when she walks she makes a clicking sound?
Chris: No.

Quote from Rochelle

Adult Chris: [v.o.] While I was running for my life, Vanessa was running her game down.
Vanessa: Listen up now, everybody. Now, we all in this together. So if we gonna win this thing, then we got to get our mojo working.
Rochelle: Mojo? Is that what we're depending on, mojo? Well, what about the stats, the line, the over, the under? What about the odds? The spread, the angle, the handicap? What about the hook, the hot game? You know, the rundown, the system? What about a tout, the trends? What about a wiseguy? Everybody needs a wiseguy.

Quote from Chris

Adult Chris: [v.o.] While Vanessa bet on the Jets, I had a date with a giant.
Kelly: Hey, Chris. Is that what you had on earlier?
Chris: No, I had an accident and I needed to change.
Kelly: An accident? What happened?
Chris: Oh, I didn't make it to the bathroom in time, so I to get something from lost-and-found.
Kelly: Wow, that's crazy. It looks good on you, though. It makes you look edgy.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Even though my bad clothes didn't seem to work, there was more bad stuff to come: bad food.
Kelly: I never heard of this place.
Chris: Yeah, everything they serve is from stuff that other people didn't finish eating.
Kelly: Oh.