Julius Quote #434

Quote from Julius in Everybody Hates Snitches

Julius: Who was that?
Rochelle: Gloria. She got a fever. She won't be able to watch the kids tonight.
Julius: What? Oh baby. I can't believe this. That was $150 worth of show tickets.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Uh-oh. She's about to do a dramatic head turn. [Rochelle turns her head] Told you.
Rochelle: Show tickets? What about our anniversary?
Julius: Well, that's what I meant. We won't be able to use those $150 worth of show tickets to celebrate our anniversary.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Sidney Poitier had nothing on my father's acting abilities.
Host: And the award for "Best Husband Acting Like He Was Sad About Not Going Out On His Anniversary When He Was Actually Upset About Losing His Money" goes to... Julius!
Julius: Yes!
Host: Julius, ladies and gentlemen.
Julius: Oh, my God! Oh, my God!


 ‘Everybody Hates Snitches’ Quotes

Quote from Tonya

Adult Chris: [v.o.] The next day, I pulled a Robert Blake and tried to forget all about the shooting.
Drew: Make sure it's tight, Tonya.
Chris: Isn't this how Houdini died?
Tonya: No, Houdini died from secondary peritonitis due to a ruptured spleen from being punched in the stomach.

Quote from Jerome

Adult Chris: [v.o.] But the next day, I was just glad everything was behind me.
Jerome: Yo, little dude from across the street. I heard they caught the shooter and you got paid. I did my part, so where's my $500?
Chris: My mom took it. You can ask her for it.
Jerome: Nah, nah, man. My deal was with you.
Chris: Well, I don't have it.
Jerome: Well, then looks like you're just gonna have to give me a dollar a day for the next... [long deliberation]
Chris: 500 days?
Jerome: I was gonna say 50. Well, that's what you get for snitching. Now, let me hold a dollar.

Quote from Rochelle

Chris: Ma, I can handle it.
Rochelle: Well, what if Drew gets a fever?
Chris: I'll call a doctor.
Rochelle: What if Tonya sets something on fire?
Chris: I'll call the Fire Department.
Rochelle: Somebody tries to break in?
Chris: I'll call the police.
Rochelle: What if you get attacked by ghosts?
Chris: I'll call Ghostbusters.