Greg: A dog. That's so cool.
Chris: Yeah, but I can't get him to do anything.
Greg: Here's a couple of books on dog training.
Chris: You just happen to have books on dog training in your locker?
Greg: I got lots of stuff in here. Let's see... Got a bartender's guide, an auction catalog to fine crystal, mostly Lalique, How to Fly a Helicopter, The Idiot's Guide to Tic-Tac-Toe, a Gutenberg Bible... and a street guide to Baghdad. You never know.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] That guidebook lists a lot more streets than they have left in Baghdad now.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Meanwhile, my father tried to get clues from the clueless.
Julius: Look, I want information, and word on the street is that you got some.
Manny: Where'd you hear that from? Radio or something, man? Ain't got no damn TV, so I heard.
Julius: Maybe you should talk to Mr. Lincoln.
Manny: A penny? You can keep your penny, man. I don't know nothing, man. I haven't heard anything. No one's told me anything. Zero.
Julius: Hey, hey, hey, you sure? I mean, maybe you want to talk to Mr. Roosevelt, too.
Manny: You know what? I would love to talk to Mr. Roosevelt. [holds up imaginary phone] Yes, Mr. President. Yeah, Julius is standing right here. Yeah, yeah. He ain't got enough money. No, he's really short of money. Yeah, he's still standing here. I will tell him, Mr. President. Okay, okay, I'll tell him. Bye-bye. ["hangs up"] Um, he says to go talk to Kill Moves 'cause Kill Moves has his ear to the street.

Julius: Forget this. I'm getting a gun.
Rochelle: Julius, do you know what would happen if we got a gun?
[fantasy montage:]
Julius: Who ate the big piece of chicken? [pistol cocking] You? Baby girl?
Rochelle: [pistols cocking] Who left the damn toilet seat up? Huh?
Tonya: Who ate all the cereal? [shotgun cocking] I will blow your freakin' head off!