Adult Chris: [v.o.] Since my grandmother was too old to go out looking for men, my mother decided to bring the men to her.
Mr. Omar: Oh, hey, Mrs. Rochelle, what can I do for you?
Rochelle: Hey, Mr. Omar. Do you remember my mother, Maxine?
Mr. Omar: Yes. Husband died telling a knock-knock joke. Tragic. Tragic.

Julius: Suspended? For talking in class?
Rochelle: What did you say?
Chris: Well, it's a routine called "The Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television."
Rochelle: Well, what are they?
Chris: I can't say them.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] We're on television, woman! Didn't you hear the name of the bit?

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Back at school, I learned another valuable lesson. You could be funny at the wrong time...
Chris: And then the guy said, "All right, fine. Just as long as you don't hit me in the back of the head with that stick." [kids laugh]
Ms. Morello: What's going on back there?
Chris: Nothing.
Ms. Morello: Oh, really. So the whole class is giggling up a storm over nothing at all? Caruso...
Joey Caruso: It wasn't me. He's the one shucking and jiving.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I guess he's never going to be in the mob.