Greg Quote #78
Quote from Greg in Everybody Hates Gambling
Greg: Dude, this is bad.
Chris: Tell me something I don't know.
Greg: The estimated weight of the earth is six sextillion tons.
Chris: Greg, that was a rhetorical question.
Greg: Sorry. I told you this was going to happen. Chris, there's only one way out.
Chris: And what's that?
Greg: We can disguise you as a Dominican. You'll speak Spanish and move to the Bronx. We'll call you Salvador Armando Guillermo Sanchez Garcia Morales. You'll never see your family again, but you won't have to pick any more games.
Chris: Or I could just pick the wrong team and everybody will think I'm a loser again and then nobody will ask me to pick anymore.
Greg: You could try that, too.
More Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates Gambling’ Quotes
Quote from Rochelle
Chris: But I wasn't gambling.
Rochelle: [mockingly:] You wasn't gambling. Well, I don't know what they call it, Mr. Spread on the Over-Under, but you better get ready to stop not gambling.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] "You better get ready to stop not gambling?"
Rochelle: The point is: boy, you better stop!
Chris: Well, I already put a stop to it. I lied to Doc about who was going to win tonight's game.
Rochelle: Oh, so you're gambling and you're lying? How long is it gonna be before we have bodies under this house? Huh?!
Quote from Rochelle
Rochelle: I don't understand this. Why everybody in this house knows how much I hate gambling, and yet everybody in this house is gambling. Can somebody explain this to me? Julius? Chris? Drew? Can you guys explain? Tonya. What do you have to say for yourself, sweetheart?
Tonya: Drew was teasing me at checkers, so I bet him so he would stop.
Rochelle: And where did you get money to place this bet?
Rochelle: Oh. Your daddy gave you money to gamble. Isn't that sweet? Give it here. [takes money from Tonya] Julius.
Julius: I was doing it just to help her build confidence.
Rochelle: Oh. You were building your daughter's confidence by turning her brother into a sucker. That's good. That's really good. [laughs] And Chrissy the Black? You're just there calling games like you're in Atlantic City, huh? Is that what you want to do if you grow up?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Notice she said "if."
Greg Wuliger Quotes
Quote from Everybody Hates the Class President
Chris: I want you to run with me. I want you to be my vice president.
Greg: Oh, man. This is great. I can work behind the scenes. I can influence the judiciary committee. I can confer with the joint chiefs. Create policy!
Chris: Greg, it's the eighth grade.
Greg: I know, but this is the best thing that's ever happened to me.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] That was until he met Seven of Nine at a Trekkie convention.
Quote from Everybody Hates Earth Day
Greg: While I was making my tanning bed, I accidentally invented an incandescent light bulb that won't burn out for 600 years.
Chris: That's amazing. Then you'll definitely get an "A."
Greg: I can't turn that in.
Chris: Why not?
Greg: Are you crazy? I'd be a marked man. I'm not taking down every major power company in the nation. They'd have me killed in a minute. So I decided to switch projects. I'm going with a dung-powered radar system.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] US patent #D349127.