Julius Quote #172
Quote from Julius in Everybody Hates Thanksgiving
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Because my father really wanted to impress his brother, my dad was cooking like a quarterback running plays.
Julius: Okay, Chris, while the macaroni is boiling on the front burner and you're grating the cheese on the chopping board, Tonya, I need you to break right into the dining room and prep the cranberry sauce. Now while the sauce is jiggling, Tonya and Drew, I need you to cover setting the table, while I scrimmage to prepare the rest of the meal. Now, Drew, I need you to cut across back into the kitchen, bake the rolls, and get them back to the table in 15 minutes. On three. One, two, three...
All: Grease!
Julius: [off Rochelle's look] What?
Rochelle: Nothing. Looks like you got it all handled. I think I'm gonna go upstairs.
Julius: But I need your help
Rochelle: No because if something goes wrong, I don't want you blaming me.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] He's blaming her right now.
Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
‘Everybody Hates Thanksgiving’ Quotes
Quote from Chris
Doc: You can make macaroni and cheese out of anything. All you got to do is...
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Whenever anyone says, "All you have to do is" the next thing they say is always something impossible.
[fantasy: Chris and a man are wearing bomb squad uniforms as they crouch in front an explosive:]
Man: Dismantling a bomb is easy. All you have to do is identify the ground wire, pull out your cutters and snip. You try it. [runs away]
[fantasy: Chris and a man are on top of a building:]
Man: Base jumping is easy. All you got to do is make sure you have enough distance from the base before you pop your chute. [voice echoing] You try... [thud]
[fantasy: A man is on the street juggling:]
Man: Juggling chainsaws is easy. All you have to do is keep one saw in the air at all times. [chainsaw buzzes] [screams]
Adult Chris: [v.o.] All you have to do is learn to live with one hand.
Chris: Hey, you want me to go get somebody or something?
Quote from Rochelle
Rochelle: Well, I', thankful that I don't have to take no mess, 'cause my man has two jobs.
Quote from Chris
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Even though I didn't like the idea of homework over Thanksgiving, I did learn what Thanksgiving was all about.
Chris: To me, Thanksgiving means family and togetherness. Thanksgiving came about when the Pilgrims landed on Plymouth Rock. The Indians greeted them, provided them shelter, taught them how to grow corn and how to prepare for the winter. They went on to cook one of the greatest meals the pilgrims every ate. And in appreciation for showing them how to prosper and survive in this brave new world, the pilgrims killed the Indians and created a holiday in their honor. So on this Thanksgiving, I'm thankful for my family, my friends, but most importantly, I'm thankful that I'm not a Native American.
[Ms. Morello is the only person to clap. The other students give Chris a blank stare. Greg shakes his head at Chris. Outside the class room, a tear runs down the eye of a Native American man.]
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Happy Thanksgiving.