Tonya Quote #36
Adult Chris: [v.o.] In 1984, Michael Jackson became the biggest star on Earth, but to my sister Tonya, he couldn't hold a candle to Billy Ocean.
Drew: What are you doing?
Tonya: I'm learning the steps from "Caribbean Queen."
Drew: There are no steps to "Caribbean Queen."
Tonya: Yes, there are. First he does like this, then he does like this, then he does like this, and then he does this, and he finishes off with this. He also does the moonwalk, but I don't know how to do that yet.
Drew: Billy Ocean doesn't moonwalk. That's Michael Jackson's move.
Tonya: Where do you think Michael got it from?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Peg Leg Bates.
Quote from Greg
Chris: I want you to run with me. I want you to be my vice president.
Greg: Oh, man. This is great. I can work behind the scenes. I can influence the judiciary committee. I can confer with the joint chiefs. Create policy!
Chris: Greg, it's the eighth grade.
Greg: I know, but this is the best thing that's ever happened to me.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] That was until he met Seven of Nine at a Trekkie convention.
Quote from Rochelle
Rochelle: Baby, what do you have to be stressed out about? You have a beautiful wife, two good jobs, and three wonderful kids, a nice home in Bed-Stuy... [chuckles] You're stressed? I mean, I'm the one who should be stressed. I mean, I got to deal with a house in the ghetto, three crazy kids, a man that's never home, and now I got to deal with you and this high blood pressure. [scoffing] You- You're stressed.
Quote from Everybody Hates Tattaglia
Tonya: So I'm getting fired for being honest?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] It happened to Don Imus. It could happen to you.
Rochelle: I'm sorry, but yes.
Tonya: You know what? I don't need this mess! My father has two jobs!
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Deja vu. My mother would have snatched the naps out of Tonya's head, but at that moment, she was just too proud.
Quote from Everybody Hates Fake IDs
Rochelle: Can you please tell your father that I have nothing to say to him.
Tonya: Mama said she has nothing to say to you.
Julius: Fine. Throw me a party.
Rochelle: Oh! So now all of a sudden you want to have a party. Well, it's too late. You just can't blow some balloons up, set a cake on fire and start hollering. You have to plan for a party. I mean, I have to send out invitations, write out a guest list, make present suggestions. Oh, no, no, you are not putting me through all that. Nuh-uh. The next time you want to have a party, you need to say something ahead of time instead of always waiting till the last minute!
Tonya: Mama said, "Oh! So now all of a sudden you want to have a party. Well, it's too late. You can't just blow up some balloons, set a cake on fire, and start hollering. You have to plan for a party. You have to invite the people. You have to invite the family from out of town. You have to get the cake. You have to get the ice cream. You have to get toys for the little kids to play with..."
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Since it's against the law to choke children on film, we're gonna go to the next scene.
Tonya: "No, you have to plan for it!"