Everybody Hates Chris Quotes

Everybody Hates Chris

Everybody Hates Chris

Everybody Hates Chris is a fictional account of Chris Rock's teenage years in Brooklyn in the 1980s. The show follows Chris, his parents Julius and Rochelle, and siblings Drew and Tonya, as they move to Bedford-Stuyvesant (Bed-Stuy) where Chris starts at a majority-White school.

Starring: Tyler James Williams, Terry Crews, Tichina Arnold, Tequan Richmond, Imani Hakim, Vincent Martella, Chris Rock.
Recurring Actors: Travis T. Flory, Jacqueline Mazarella, Kevontay Jackson, Ernest Thomas, Jeris Poindexter, Michel Estime, Antonio Fargas, Jackee Harry, Todd Bridges, J.B. Smoove, Earthquake, Tony Rock.
Original Run: 2005-2009.

Quote of the Day

Quote from Adult Chris in Everybody Hates Rejection

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Standing there waiting for Yvette was one of the best feelings I'd had. But after 15 minutes, I thought, "Maybe the buses are running late." After 30 minutes, I thought, "Maybe the bus broke down." After an hour, I thought, "Maybe the bus got in an accident, skidded through the guardrail, exploded in midair, and ended up at the bottom of the East River." After the movie was over, I thought, "Maybe she never got on that bus at all." To this day, I can't make it through Footloose without crying.

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Popular Quotes

Quote from Rochelle in Everybody Hates Sausage

Adult Chris: [v.o.] My father always worked two jobs, which made my mother so comfortable, she'd quit her job over anything.
[flashback to Rochelle as a waitress:]
Woman: Check, please?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] And I mean anything.
Rochelle: Now, do I look like I have your check? All that hollering at people. I don't need this. My husband has two jobs. I don't need to be here right now.
[flashback to Rochelle as a receptionist:]
Man: Hold my calls.
Rochelle: Who are you hollering at? "Hold my calls." Hold your own damn call! I do not need this! My man has two jobs!

Quote from Julius in Everybody Hates the Pilot

Julius: I know you're not gonna throw that away. Eat that. That's 30 cents worth of oatmeal.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My father always knew what everything costs.
[montage:]
Julius: [retrieving a chicken wing from the trash] That's $1.09 in the trash.
Julius: [next to a tray of burnt biscuits] That's $2 on fire.
Julius: That's 49 cents of spilled milk dripping all over my table. Somebody's gonna drink this milk.

Quote from Drew in Everybody Hates the English Teacher

Drew: 21.
Mr. Omar: You hit on 17?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] What Mr. Omar didn't know was that when it came to numbers, Drew was like my father.
[montage:]
Drew: Wow, that's 562,002 granules of sugar.
Drew: Wow, that's 357,000 raindrops.
Drew: Wow, that's one cupcake.

Trending Quotes

Quote from Vanessa in Everybody Hates Big Bird

Adult Chris: [v.o.] I realized my mistake, and Vanessa realized that going out with Kill Moves wasn't a mistake at all.
Rochelle: You were out all night?
Vanessa: Oh, girl, that's just the start of it. We opened the champagne, headed for the seaport. There was a pink helicopter waiting for me.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] You can hear about the rest of Vanessa's date at www.vanessasbigdatewithkillmoves.tv