Granda Joe Quote #28
Mary: Listen, wains, I've already said this to Erin.
Erin: Mammy, please!
Mary: No funny business with these Protestant lads. Is that clear? I don't want anybody landing back here pregnant.
James: Not very likely in my case.
Joe: I wouldn't rule it out, son.
Quote from Clare
Clare: Seriously, folks, I'm not feeling entirely comfortable with this!
Father Peter: One... [Philip chuckles] two... [Clare screams] three.
Clare: [screams] Stop! Stop it! Get me out of here! He's trying to kill me! He wants to kill us all! All of the Catholics! Look at his eyes, he's a madman! A Fenian-hating madman. Don't let the Jaffa bastard hurt me! Please!
Erin: Jesus, Clare!
Michelle: Fuck-a-doodle do!
Quote from Orla
Orla: Ooh! Protestants like to march and Catholics like to walk.
Father Peter: OK, can we just...? Jenny, could you just...? Oh, you've already written it down, have you? Great, thank you, Jenny. I want to just pause and think about what's in here. What about the fact that we all feel and love and hope and... Write this down. We all cry. [Aisling, in charge of the "Similarities" board, is unsure whether to write this down] We all laugh. We all dream. I just want to think along those lines, for a moment. OK?
Boy: Catholics watch RTE!
Girl: Protestants love cleaning!
Michelle: Protestants are taller!
Dee: Catholics have more freckles!
Orla: Protestants hate ABBA!
Quote from Episode Five
Gerry: Joe, it's all just a bit trickier today. There are so many roadblocks up, there are so many diversions, and, you know, I drive for a living.
Joe: He says this like it's something to be proud of.
Gerry: Look, we just need to get out of this place as quickly and as quietly as possible.
Joe: You know what age I am, boy? You know how many of these parades I've lived through? You think I don't realise how quickly a situation can turn? Do you think I would do anything to put my family at risk?
Gerry: No. Of course not. I'm sorry.
[cut to Joe's car stuck in the middle of the Orange Order parade:]
Joe: What are you looking at, you tangerine tool?!
Quote from The Agreement
Granda Joe: Right, as far as I can make out, this thing has two main aims. Firstly, to stop us all killing one another.
Aunt Sarah: Fair enough.
Granda Joe: And secondly, to allow us to govern ourselves from here, rather than England.
Aunt Sarah: From Derry?
Granda Joe: I would say so.
Da Gerry: Would it not be more likely to be Belfast? Belfast is the capital.
Ma Mary: Aye, but that was an oversight, Gerry.