Janette: So are you still in your little shop, Mary?
Mary: Woolworths is actually quite a big shop, but, yes, I am, although I'm starting university next year. I'm going to study English.
Janette: [laughs] Oh, my God, that's so funny! That's such a funny joke! Hilarious! That is hilarious! [stops laughing] Well, look, we are gonna go and work the room. We probably won't stay super late, because Richard has an early start in the morning, because he's a surgeon.
Joe: Before you head off, son, I have a question for you. When you take someone's tonsils out, do you hang on to them? Do you whack them in a jar and put them in a storage cupboard, or whatever? [Richard and Janette shake their heads] What, you chuck them away?! [Richard and Janette nod] Ah. I'll pass that on.
Janette: OK, then. It was so lovely catching up. We should all do brunch sometime.

Gerry: I mean, it's incredible. Not a squeak.
Joe: Slapping him might work.
Gerry: You're not slapping him, Joe.
Joe: I don't wanna slap him. I want you to slap him. Then he might slap you back, which I would enjoy.

Gerry: Where'd you pull that from?
Joe: Your arse.
Gerry: OK, Joe, the insults need a bit of work.

Mary: Anything?
Gerry: This is for Erin.
Mary: Oh, private and confidential.
Aunt Sarah: Will I stick the kettle on and we'll steam it open, Mary?
Gerry: That's actually a criminal offence, Sarah.
Joe: Your face should be a criminal offence.
Gerry: Oh, morning, Joe.

Aunt Sarah: I've booked to see Bjorn Again. Have to give this a miss.
Mary: You're going to give your own engagement party a miss?
Joe: Well, now, to be fair, as ABBA tribute acts go, they're the best in the country.
Aunt Sarah: They really are the genuine article.
Gerry: Except, by definition, they're not. They're a tribute act.
Joe: You're an arsehole act!

Mary: What are you supposed to be? Swans?
Erin: We're not swans.
Orla: Are we not?
Clare: We're angels.
Aunt Sarah: Angels don't use crutches.
Gerry: And swans do?
Joe: You're a swan expert now, are you?
Gerry: Yeah, that's precisely what I said.

[flashback to 1977:]
Joe: All right, then, off you go.
Wee Mary: Are you not heading home now?
Joe: No, no, no. I'd better stay put in case there's any bother.
Wee Mary: You'll stay here till ten o'clock?
Wee Aunt Sarah: Aye, that's madness, Daddy. You should come to the disco with us.
Wee Mary: Do you have concussion?!
Joe: Don't you worry about me, girls. Just go and enjoy yourselves.
Wee Mary: We'll try. I suppose he's right to be nervous. About the boys' school being here, I mean.
Wee Aunt Sarah: Why, Mary?
Wee Mary: Tonight's gonna be wild, Sarah!

Gerry: Look, it's gone. The docket is gone. Why don't we just move on?
Joe: Why don't you just move out?

Mary: Hold on. You were there! Leavers' night. The school disco.
Rob: What a night that was.
Gerry: Really? Do tell us more, Rob.
Joe: Look, it's the prat pack.
Gerry: Where the hell did you come from?!
Joe: Never you mind. That's some spread over there. Sandwiches like doorsteps. Who are you?
Deidre: It's my cousin Rob.
Rob: Very pleased to meet you.
Joe: What part of America are you from?
Rob: Montreal.
Joe: Can't say I'm familiar with it, though there is a Montreal in Canada, you know?
Rob: Is that right?