Best ‘Cheers’ Quotes   Page 2 of 25    

Quote from Carla in Cheerio, Cheers

Coach: Carla, what are you looking for? A sign from God? Religious belief is based on faith.
Carla: Yeah, well, I never thought I'd say this, Coach, but I think I've lost faith.
Frasier: Hey, listen up, everybody. I have an announcement to make. Diane here is leaving for Europe and she's not coming back to Cheers ever.
[Carla drops to her knees and prays]
Carla: [sings] I believe for every drop of rain that falls a flower grows. I believe that somewhere in the darkest night a candle glows.

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Quote from Norm in Behind Every Great Woman

Norm: [enters] Afternoon, everybody.
All: Norm!
Sam: What would you like, Norm?
Norm: A reason to live. Keep them coming.

Quote from Norm in Sam at Eleven

Norm: [enters] Afternoon.
Sam: Hey, Norm!
Coach: Norm!
Norm: Gimme a beer, will you?
Coach: How's life treating you, Norm?
Norm: Like I just ran over its dog.

Quote from Sam in The Proposal

Sam: You know, for the longest time, I kept pretending about you. I guess I was afraid to really admit my feelings. But from the very start, down deep inside, I have been crazy about you. Crazier about you than any other woman I've ever met. I mean, hell, I was crazy about you even when I hated you. [Diane laughs] What I'm trying to say is will you marry me?
Diane: No.
Sam: No?
Diane: No.
Sam: Are you serious?
Diane: I'm afraid I am.
Sam: Well... seems to me you have two choices. One, I can throw you in. Or two, you can jump in.

Quote from Lilith in The Girl in the Plastic Bubble

Lilith: Well, I'm off. I don't know what the future holds. Whatever happens, I only hope I can realize my full potential. To acquire things the old Lilith never had.
Carla: Like a body temperature?
Lilith: That's very good, Carla. Incidentally, I've taken your little wisecracks for a few years now, you hideous gargoyle, and if you ever open that gateway to hell you call a mouth in my direction again, I'll snap off your extremities like dead branches and feed them to you at gunpoint. God! That felt good.
Carla: Well... that was just plain rude.

Quote from Lilith in The Girl in the Plastic Bubble

Lilith: I'm going now. I'd like to leave a parting word. I want you to know that what I'm doing is very difficult. It is not to hurt Frasier. It's to acknowledge the fact that I'm changing. No one can go living year in and year out without ever changing. It's impossible. [looks at Norm and Cliff] Or at least it's very rare.

Quote from Lilith in I'm Okay, You're Defective

[some time in the future:]
Lawyer: I am sorry about the passing of your husband, Lilith. Frasier was a good man, and we will all miss him.
Lilith: Thank you.
Lawyer: Well, I now have the unhappy task of reading your late husband's will.
Frederick: You okay, Mother?
Lilith: Yes. Thank you, Frederick.
Lawyer: "Sam Malone's sperm count is well within normal range."
Lilith: That damn bar.

Quote from Frasier in Finally! (Part 2)

Frasier: You know, I agree with Cliff. There's a great deal to be said for discretion. You know, it's entirely possible Rebecca may grow tired of Robin and thus avoid the heartache. Then on the other hand, as one who was cuckolded by a lover deeply trusted, the longer led on, the harder the fall. I'm just not sure that Rebecca can be as strong and forgiving as I was when... that bitch Diane dumped me.

Quote from Sam in Bidding on the Boys

Sam: Come on, man, she's just doing it to make you jealous.
Frasier: Oh, God, I'm losing her, Sam.
Sam: Oh, would you stop that? You're my friend. I'm never going to take a woman away from you.
Frasier: What about Diane?
Sam: And didn't God punish me with a vengeance?
Frasier: Well, yes, but gee whiz, Sam...

Quote from Esther Clavin in The Last Angry Mailman

Cliff: Boy, oh, boy. Don't you just love this Yorkshire pudding, Ma? That's a real delicacy.
Esther Clavin: The English didn't think so. Actually, Yorkshire pudding was invented in the late 1770s during a beef shortage. A person could be given a little bit of beef and soak up the gravy with the pudding, thereby fooling his stomach into thinking he was having a fuller dinner than he actually was.
Cliff: And you wonder why nobody asks us out anymore.

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