‘The Sam in the Gray Flannel Suit’
Season 6, Episode 20 - Aired March 3, 1988
Evan Drake (Tom Skerritt) promotes Sam to a job in corporate.
Quote from Sam
Carla: Hey, maybe he's going to put Sam in charge of the bar again.
Rebecca: What? Don't make me laugh.
Evan Drake: [coming down the stairs] Sam, I'm serious about that offer. Now, I want to move you up. What do you say?
Sam: Oh, sounds tempting.
Evan Drake: When I see you behind that bar, the more convinced I am your talents are being wasted.
Sam: Yeah, I know, I know, but they won't let me bring a bed in here.
Quote from Sam
Evan Drake: Uh, it's all set, Sam.
Sam: Hey, uh, listen. Uh, I'm really excited about this, but are you sure that I'm qualified? I mean, you know, I never even finished college.
Evan Drake: How far did you get?
Sam: Halfway through the application. I still have it here if you...
Evan Drake: Nah, that's okay. You're qualified.
Quote from Rebecca
Rebecca: Oh, my! I finally figured it out. Life makes sense, and I am not crazy.
Frasier: Well, that's only a layman's opinion.
Rebecca: Sam is a ringer. Evan just hired him to win the championship. In two weeks, he'll be out of there.
Frasier: Now, Rebecca, you can't tell him that. At least let the man enjoy his day in the sun.
Rebecca: All right. Sam has taken enough hard knocks this year. No, it's pleasure enough for me to just know. I won't break his heart.
Sam: Oh, hey, uh, Rebecca, the guys decided that you could be our cheerleader on one condition. Lose the bra. [raucous laughter]
Rebecca: I won't break his heart. I will rip it from his chest.
Quote from Sam
Sam: Well, Rebecca welcome to the, uh, executive office. Would you like to have a seat in the executive chair there? Or maybe on the executive sofa? Or how 'bout the executive lap? [recorded cackling]
Quote from Sam
Sam: No, but, uh, seriously, uh, what-what brings you down to corporate?
Rebecca: Oh, I have a little information about your promotion that I'm going to really enjoy sharing with you.
Sam: Oh, yeah. Listen. Before you do, there's something I want to talk to you about, too. Uh, sit down, please, sit down. [Rebecca sighs] Uh, I just want to say tha- that I'm sorry, you know, for teasing you the way I did and everything. I know we both had a lot of fun with it, but i- it wasn't right.
Rebecca: That's okay. I just wanted to tell you-
Sam: No, no, no. See, it, it wasn't okay. I mean, absolutely not. I- I think I was just trying to, you know, show off in front of the guys. Truth is this is all kind of new to me. I keep expecting somebody to come through the door and say, "Malone, job's over. You're through. Get out of here," and it's a big joke.
Rebecca: Good. Is it my turn now?
Sam: No, in a second, in a second. You know, the, uh, first thing that I did when I was alone in the office here, l, uh, called my father, who I hadn't talked to for over three years. And when I told him where I was sitting, you know, what I was looking out at, and, uh, what, what my title is... [sighs] for the first time ever, he told me how proud he was of me. [chuckling] Anyway. Whoa! Uh, what- What are you dying to tell me here? [clears throat]
Rebecca: Just that we are darn proud of you, too.
Sam: Oh, thank you! God, that's great. Thank you.
Quote from Sam
Sam: Sorry I'm late.
Evan Drake: I guess that about wraps it up.
Sam: Uh, say, before you go, I just want to say that I'm really backed up with paperwork, and I won't be able to make the game tonight.
Heppel: What? Can't make the game? Hey, wait a minute, Evan. I- I didn't give up my office two weeks to let this guy do paperwork.
Evan Drake: Easy, Heppel.
Sam: Heppel? What? You're Heppel? But I thought that you were supposed... Oh, boy. I- I am a ringer. That's right. I'm right, aren't l, that I'm a ringer?
Evan Drake: Well, I'll be straight with you, Sam. Sure, we originally hired you to pitch for the softball team, but, uh, actually, you've turned out to be somewhat of a surprise.
Sam: Oh?
Evan Drake: Yeah, yeah, you're a much better hitter than we anticipated.
Quote from Woody
Sam: Ho! Lock up your women! Sammy's back. [all greeting]
Frasier: Sam, you know, I'm sorry to hear about the termination there, buddy.
Norm: Yeah, tough luck, pal.
Sam: Yeah. Hey, easy come, easy go. No, truth is, it was a shock, but then l, uh... [clears throat] I went into the executive washroom, and I splashed some water on my face, and I looked in the mirror, and the mirror looked back and said, "You're not an executive, man. Get back to where you belong."
Cliff: All right. Smart there.
Woody: I thought they only had mirrors like that in the movies.
Sam: It's good to be back.
Quote from Rebecca
Rebecca: Oh, God, you are choice, Malone. You are just really choice. You will do anything for a roll in the hay. If you will play on my sympathies, then you will stoop to anything. God, I am tired of fighting you. I just don't have the strength to do it anymore. If this is what you really want, then by all means. [flatly] Take me here. Take me now. Please, please.
Sam: Are you serious?
Rebecca: Oh, yes. I want it bad. [Rebecca's body goes limp]
Sam: [turns the lights off] Well, all right.
[After Rebecca lays her limp body across Sam's legs, Sam tries to lift her arm around his neck but it just flops back down]
Sam: Is something wrong?
Rebecca: [Oh, nothing. Oh, baby, oh, baby. [falls to the ground]
Sam: Le- Let me get this straight. Is this what I can expect in the way of full participation?
Rebecca: Until I get tired. [Sam sighs as he stands up and walks out of her office] Was it good for you?
Quote from Sam
Sam: Hey, you know, actually, uh, these, uh, windows don't open. You're in a what's called a climate- controlled office.
Norm: Very impressed, Sam, eh?
Cliff: Oh, hey, Sammy, you do look every inch the corporate muckety-muck there, doesn't he?
Sam: Well, you know, I don't want to brag. Mimi, get in here and brag for me, will you? [laughter] Just kidding, Mimi.
Quote from Woody
Rebecca: Payday, payday. Sam, Carla, Woody.
Woody: Oh, come to Papa, baby. Boy, have I got plans for you.
Cliff: Yeah, no kidding, Woody? What are you going to do with it?
Woody: Put it in the bank.
Norm: Whoo, don't get arrested, buddy.