Cliff: Yeah, hey, uh, Carla, look, l, uh, I really wanna tell ya how much I appreciate you, uh, invitin' me over here.
Carla: Don't mention it.
Cliff: l, uh, really appreciate it.
Carla: No, I mean, don't ever mention to anyone that I let you in this house.

Cliff: Oh, hey, no waitin' around for my contribution. Here ya go.
Woody: Popcorn balls!
Cliff: Chow down, hear?
Woody: Hey, aren't these what you brought to the Halloween party?
Cliff: Well, yeah, they're a perennial favorite, Woodman.
Woody: Yeah, but aren't these the ones you brought to the Halloween party?

Sam: Come on, open the door.
Carla: No, no...
Sam: It's Thanksgiving, Carla.
Carla: Oh! Okay maybe she'll choke on a drumstick.

Diane: Isn't this game over yet?
Woody: Not yet.
Diane: Well, their uniforms are different colors than before.
Cliff: Uh, well, they gotta change them every time they score a touchdown, Diane.

Sam: Somebody save me a seat. I got to see a man about a horse.
Woody: He doesn't really have to see a man about a horse.

Norm: Uh, guys, uh, listen, I'm having a slight, uh, problem with the damn bird, all right?
Diane: What color is it now, Norman?
Norm: Well, I think we're moving into the earth tones.

Carla: This better be good news, Norm.
Norm: Look, uh, I'm sorry, guys. The little pop thing won't pop out. There's something wrong with it.
Carla: There's something wrong with you.
Norm: No, no, it's the little pop thing. Hey, could somebody please explain to me where the little pop thing is on the turkey? I mean, 'cause maybe it's different in the city, but in the country where I come from, turkeys aren't born with little pop things.
Frasier: The little pop thing has a name! It's called a thermometer! Now can we all please say "thermometer."
All: [yell] Thermometer!

Carla: Well, pass me my peas. I made them so I know they're okay.
Norm: Was that remark, uh, directed at me, Carla, by any chance?
Carla: No, it was directed at your stupid turkey and your stupid stuffing and your stupid gravy.
Norm: What's wrong with my gravy?
Carla: Oh, nothing, except you could walk across the skin on top of it.
Norm: Oh, well, I'm sorry, Julia Child. Here's your perfect peas. Oh, look, I spilled one. [flicks a pea at Carla] Sorry.
Carla: Thank you. Norm, I'm sorry about what I said about your gravy.
Norm: All right.
Carla: It's okay.
Norm: Fine.
Carla: And so are the carrots. [throws a carrot at Norm]
Cliff: Uh, anybody want some of these, uh, lovely yams? [flings the yams at Frasier]
Frasier: Woody, would you care to test the gravy skin? [splashes gravy at Woody]
Diane: People! People! People! Stop this immediately! I have never been witness to such a silly, soph- [Sam throws cranberries at Diane] Sam Malone kiss your butt good-bye!
Carla: Food fight!

Norm: [o.s.] Vera. You came. Honey, I'm so happy. Hey, you guys, uh... Come on, Vera, come on in, meet all the guys.
Sam: This is great. We finally get to meet Vera.
Diane: Sam think fast!
[Diane throws a plate of pie in Sam's direction, but he ducks, sending it straight into the living room. Norm walks in with a woman whose face is covered in pie]
Norm: Everybody, this is, uh, Vera. [fade to black]
Vera: Charming friends, Norm. Get your coat.
Norm: Yes, dear.

Diane: Prithee, friends, what thinkst thou?
Sam: You look ridiculous.
Diane: I beg your pardon. This is an absolutely authentic example of feminine colonial headwear.
Sam: I'm sorry. Thou lookest ridiculous.