Woody Quote #504
Norm: Guys, guys, we're going nuts here. I tell you, man, it's just sheer luck that no one was hurt in this situation, other than Rebecca.
Cliff: Wait, wait, wait, wait. This might be part of Gary's master plan.
Cliff: Keep us on the edge, off balance.
Woody: Yeah. Mr. Clavin's right. I think Gary's probably playing with us, like a rat with a mouse.
Sam: That's a cat and mouse, Woody. Cat and mouse.
Woody: Sam, a cat and a mouse don't play together. They're mortal enemies. They don't even know the same games. Think before you speak, Sam.
Quote from Woody
Carla: What are you talking about? This is St. Paddy's Day. It's one of the busiest nights of the year. It's when Gary wheels out the big guns.
Sam: He can't do anything worse to us than he did last year. Remember that? The place was packed and Gary and his goons filled our stairwell with potatoes.
Woody: Yeah, and just my luck I was sitting on the bottom step tying my shoe at the time. Lucky for me you guys were able to dig me out. I'd hate to be the second member of my family buried alive by potatoes.
Quote from Norm
Norm: [enters] Morning, everyone.
Sam: What are you up to, Norm?
Norm: My ideal weight if I were 11 feet tall.
Quote from Lilith
Sam: So you don't have any relatives or friends you can ask to watch the baby?
Frasier: Oh, I'd gladly ask my parents. Of course, they're dead. Well, as for friends, l... [looks around the bar] well...
Sam: Sorry. Stupid question.
Lilith: Frasier, good news. I finally found a woman with whom we can leave our baby for one night.
Frasier: Oh, great. Tell me about her.
Lilith: Well, she's 79 years old, she can't see her hands without her glasses, but she assures me she can smell smoke.
Frasier: Lilith, this is wonderful. At last we'll have a night alone together.
Lilith: Yes, it's just what we need. Our relationship is at a point where the rekindling of romance is both appropriate and welcome, to say nothing of timely.
Frasier: Stop, Lilith. You're getting me hot. [they walk out together]
Quote from The Last Picture Show
Cliff: So, uh, what'd I miss? Why- Why is that girl, uh, running around screaming at everybody?
Norm: Well, she's trying to convince them that, uh, that Godzilla's merely confused and not really trying to hurt them.
Cliff: Isn't that the part usually played by Akiro Nakamoto?
Norm: Yeah, yeah. But, uh, she left halfway through the Godzilla series.
Woody: I don't understand. Why would an actress leave right in the middle of a successful series?
Quote from Bar Wars VI: This Time It's for Real
Sam: Come on. It's a golden opportunity. We can win this time. We can steal all of Gary's best ideas and use 'em against this new guy. And you remember how Gary's always going first? We can learn from that. We can move first ourselves.
Frasier: Very good, Sam. As that famous prankster Santayana once said, "Those who do not learn from history are condemned to repeat it."
Woody: You got that right, Doctor Crane. Back in high school I was condemned to repeat History three times. By the way, the same goes for Mathematics.