Cliff: So, hey, Normie, so how's business going?
Norm: Lousy, Cliffie. I'm so damn busy painting, I haven't had time to stop in here and visit with my best friend.
Cliff: I missed you, too, you big lug.
Norm: Actually, Cliffie, I meant Mr. Beer.
Woody: So, the painting business is that good, huh?
Norm: Too good, Woody. Today I had to choose between two really great jobs. I couldn't make up my mind.
Woody: So what did you do?
Norm: Skipped them both. Came in here. I think I made the right choice.

Dennis: OK, but I'm kind of pressed for time. I've got to get to my hair stylist.
Sam: Good. Good. Oh, very good, very good. Hair stylist. All right. All right, this will be pretty simple here. Just a few multiple-choice questions.
Dennis: Great. Shoot.
Sam: Number one. "It's high noon. You're driving in Harvard Square. Parking's limited. Do you A: Park in a handicapped zone, B: Park in a regular spot under a tree, C: Drive around till a space opens up?"
Dennis: "C."
Sam: What, are you nuts? I can't believe it, man! That's a trick question. You don't drive this baby at nigh noon, man! Sun damage, bucko. What the hell's wrong... What do you want to do, oxidize the paint? Get out of here! You make me sick! I can't believe that! He wants to drive my car at high noon in Harvard Square.

Frasier: Norm, your situation puts me in mind of a wonderful play by Bertolt Brecht.
Norm: Yeah?
Frasier: Yes, it's about a poor put-upon woman, who, similar to you, is having trouble dealing with the people that are taking advantage of her.
Cliff: Oh, what did she do?
Frasier: Well, she developed a entirely new and different personality to handle these people. It's set in the orient. It's "The Good Woman of Szechwan."
Norm: Hmm. Sounds good.
Frasier: Oh, yes, it's one of Brecht's masterpieces.
Norm: No, I mean, Chinese food. I know a great place. Phone book, Woody?
Frasier: I don't know why I try to have an intellectual conversation with the two of you. All you think about is... Say, how's their kung pao shrimp?