Sam Quote #721
Diane: Dr. Weinstein? My date needs medical attention. Can you help?
Sam: My food just arrived.
Dr. Fisher: Well, I'm a doctor.
Diane: Sit down. I- I want the world-famous heart surgeon, Dr. Julian Weinstein.
Dr. Fisher: Well, of course; I bow to his greater skill.
Sam: Well, no, no, no, uh, why don't you go ahead there, Fisher, and give him a shot?
Diane: He's having chest pains, Doctor!
Sam: Oh, well, uh, why don't you time them and see how far apart they are?
Quote from Sam
Diane: Dr. Weinstein.
Sam: Uh-uh, uh-uh.
Diane: You swine. It's one thing to pretend to be somebody else on the phone, but convincing others that you're a sophisticated gourmet is a little bit more than you can handle. You're going to blow it, Sam. You're going to be embarrassed in front of some of the most important people in Boston. And then you're going to slink out of here with your curly little swine tail between your legs.
Sam: You don't think I can handle this? Well, just watch. Excuse me, we'd like to start off with Bouches Parmentier au Fromage, followed by a salade maison, and for our entre, we'll have Tourte Froide D'Anguille Rabelais. Thank you so much.
Diane: Good, Sam; that was your busboy.
Sam: I knew that. He's got lips. He can tell the waiter, can't he?
Diane: Bon appetit, Dr. Weinstein.
Quote from Carla
Norm: That's, uh that's quite an achievement, though, Cliffie.
Carla: Oh, yeah? Look who's talkin'.
Norm: Oh, okay, all right. I know some people around here don't exactly think that I'm an overachiever, but, uh I'll tell you, I don't plan to go to my grave until I've made some sort of impression on this world.
Carla: [looks at Norm's bar stool] I'd say you've already made a deep one.
Quote from I Will Gladly Pay You Tuesday
Diane: Sam, I know you to be a man of pride and principle, but strength is also to be found in the ability to bend. Witness the willow, nature's strongest tree.
Sam: No, I thought the oak was the strongest tree.
Diane: Only in furniture.
Sam: What about the saying "strong as the mighty oak"?
Diane: The oak can be felled by a single harsh wind under the right circumstances.
Sam: All right, but what about birch and mahogany? Now, those--
Diane: Would you shut up about the damn trees?
Sam: You brought them up.
Quote from The Proposal
Sam: You know, for the longest time, I kept pretending about you. I guess I was afraid to really admit my feelings. But from the very start, down deep inside, I have been crazy about you. Crazier about you than any other woman I've ever met. I mean, hell, I was crazy about you even when I hated you. [Diane laughs] What I'm trying to say is will you marry me?
Sam: Are you serious?
Diane: I'm afraid I am.
Sam: Well... seems to me you have two choices. One, I can throw you in. Or two, you can jump in.