Diane: The point is that I played this harmless trick on them, and now they're going to get back at me. At first I approached it with my usual good humor, but now I find I'm obsessed. I need your help.
Frasier: Well, I think one or two sessions should clear it up.
Diane: Oh, Frasier, I don't want counselling. I want you to spy on them.
Frasier: Uh-huh.
Diane: Get close to them. Find out what heinous revenge they have planned--! [Diane gasps as a man comes out of the bathrooms]
Frasier: Diane, look at yourself. I mean, no wonder you're such easy fodder for their little pranks. Look, the problem is you take everything so seriously. Take it from me, who used to do the same thing, it's not worth it. I'm much happier now that I let things bounce off of me. Now that I'm happy-go-lucky Frasier Crane.
Diane: Frasier, you're right. I do take things too seriously. I need to lighten up a little.
Frasier: Great. Now that we've taken care of that, do you think there's any chance that you'll ever love me again before I lie mouldering in the grave? Oh, I'm joking, of course. It's just another example of my devil-may-care attitude.

Woody: Wow, Miss Chambers, what kind of poetry are you gonna recite?
Diane: Oh, you too, Woody. Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive.
Woody: Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but I've heard that before.

Carla: More coffee for Chuckles.
Sam: Who?
Carla: That guy over there. Haven't you noticed him? He's been sitting there for a couple hours drinking coffee and staring at us.
Sam: So, what's the problem?
Carla: I'll tell you what's the problem. He doesn't smile. He doesn't talk. He looks at me like I'm not there. You'd think I'd slept with him or something.