Cliff Quote #41

Quote from Cliff in Old Flames

Cliff: Hey, Diane, I wouldn't try too hard to domesticate the guy. You're going against eons of biology on this one.
Diane: What are you talking about?
Cliff: Well, you know, early cavemen went out and hunted for the food that graced their simple table. The women stayed in the cave and developed art, culture, what have you. But men, down through the centuries, have always been hunters. You know, doers. Adventurers. Cogito, it is not in man's nature to sit alone and be passive and docile.
Norm: [groans]
Cliff: What's the matter, Norm?
Norm: Oh, nothing, just my shorts are binding up on me.
Cliff: Just, you know, stand up and straighten them out a little bit.
Norm: No, I'll give them five minutes. Sometimes they self-correct.


 ‘Old Flames’ Quotes

Quote from Coach

Carla: You know, Coach, every night you walk out of here and forget your keys. Have you got them this time?
Coach: It's OK, Carla. I got it all figured out. I left them in the car.
Carla: Aren't you afraid somebody's gonna steal it?
Coach: I locked the doors.
Carla: How are you going to get in without your keys?
Coach: I made a duplicate set.
Carla: Well, where are they, Coach?
Coach: Holy mackerel! Sam. [Sam hands him his keys] Carla, we've really got to make a scramble. Looks like rain. Come on. I left the windows open.

Quote from Norm

Norm: Arlene Horsley. Yeah, she's a typist at that firm I got fired from. I gave her a slice of my pizza one day during a coffee break, and things kind of took off from there. Anyway, we caught a little movie this afternoon.
Coach: What was playing?
Norm: I finally got around to seeing Gandhi, Coach.
Cliff: Whoa. Gandhi. A fine piece of cinematic art there.
Norm: Well, I'm out of here.
Carla: Where are you going?
Norm: I gotta get back before Arlene starts to me.
Carla: Where is she?
Norm: She's watching Gandhi. I'm just out for popcorn. I'll see you in an hour when I go out for jujubes.

 Cliff Clavin Quotes

Quote from What Is... Cliff Clavin?

Alex Trebek: Cliff, it's all right, you don't have to worry. Unless you risked more than $21,600, you will be the new Jeopardy! champion. So let's take a look and see what your wager was. You bet "22,000 big ones"? Which takes you down to zero. You bet it all. Cliff, why would you do something like that?
Cliff: It's because I knew that those people had never been in my kitchen. You can ask them. Come on, Tony Curtis is still alive. Get him on the phone, go ahead, I'll pay for the call.
Alex Trebek: Isn't going to work, Cliff, sorry. Agnes, $400 is not a big total, but today it's enough to make you the new Jeopardy! champion. So congratulations.
Cliff: No, she's not! I'm the champion! I answered all those questions! You saw me, America! Write in and tell them!
Norm: Come on, Wood, if we sneak out right now, nobody will know we're with him.
Cliff: Tony Curtis, if you're out there, if you can hear me, call in, and I'll split the pot with you. Ah, for crying out loud, look... Any mail carriers out there?

Quote from Teaching with the Enemy

Frasier: I want you all to know... I'm not blaming her. It's because of me that my life is in the arms of another man.
Woody: Uh, well, you mean "wife," don't you, Dr. Crane?
Frasier: What?
Woody: You said "life." "It's because of me my life is in the arms of another man."
Cliff: Oh, that's a- That's a Freudian slip there, Woody.
Woody: What's a Freudian slip?
Cliff: Oh, that's when you say one thing when you're actually thinking about a mother.