Coach Quote #138

Quote from Coach in Affairs of the Heart

Coach: Come on. Keep thinking. Think. What problem did Lefty have?
Sam: Well, he was ugly as a mud fence. I remember that. He was a bad dresser. Oh, he used to spit tobacco juice all over.
Diane: Could we forget Lefty? What's wrong with Hank, Coach?
Sam: Oh, wait a minute. Wait a minute, I got it. Coach, Lefty had a heart problem.
Coach: That's it. Hank has the same thing. I mean, the least bit of excitement, wham, bam it's curtains.
Diane: Coach, how about sex?
Coach: Diane, please! I thought you were Sam's girl.
Diane: Coach, I'm talking about Hank.
Coach: Hank is seeing Carla. [to Sam] Are you listening to this?

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 ‘Affairs of the Heart’ Quotes

Quote from Norm

Sam: Hey, come on. It's only a quarter.
Norm: Only a quarter? That's easy for you to say. Maybe this will change your tune.
Coach: Sam, watch it. He's going for his gun.
Norm: It's my calculator, Coach. I'm going to have to figure out how much I can drink and still stay within my suds allowance. Hmm.
Sam: What have you got?
Norm: I'm going to have to cut back 8.7%. Comes out to one beer every half hour. I'm going to have to drink a little more slowly. [Norm downs a beer] Slowing down isn't so bad.

Quote from Norm

Norm: [enters] Afternoon, everybody.
All: Norm!
Diane: Norman.
Coach: How's life, Norm?
Norm: Ask a man who's got one. [Coach serves him a beer] Ah, here's mine now.

Quote from Carla

Carla: The only thing I'm scared of is if I go to bed with him he's gonna be so crazed with desire I'll never get rid of him.
Sam: Ah, Carla, that's not what you're afraid of. You're afraid that you're going to fall for this guy.
Carla: No, I'm not going to fall for this guy. I've already fallen for this guy.
Sam: Ah-ha. And now you're afraid he's going to turn into a jerk?
Carla: No, smart guy. He's already a jerk.
Sam: Why's he a jerk?
Carla: Because he's dishonest.
Sam: Why is he dishonest?
Carla: Because he's hiding the fact that he's a jerk.